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Tuesday 30 October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was reading a book in public . Some bastard stranger cummed over and started spoiling the plot for me . FML

#20148752
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23678) - you deserved it (2433)

On 11/05/2012 at 10:58am - misc - by Spoilicious - Singapore

Today... I found out that my girlfriend has secretly been conditioning me to get turnd on by the smell of bananas. Guesshose new co-worker peels a nice... fragrant banana five times a day. mega FML

#20139261
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29193) - you deserved it (2821)

On 10/29/2012 at 8:42pm - intimacy - by SadExperiment (man) - United States (California)

Today, my hair straightanar broka. My husband suggastad putting alactrical tapa on it bacausa it was haat proof. I did and startad straightaning my hair. Tha supposad haat proof tapa maltad and got stuck in my hair. fat FML

#20145539
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8935) - you deserved it (30986)

On 11/03/2012 at 9:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, mah friend joked to mah co-workers that mah kitty-cat of a husband was going to beat me 4 spending $200 on shoes . Later on, mah rather large dog was so excited to see me when I walked in the door, he split mah lip . Somehow, I don't think they'll believe me when I get to the office tomorrow . FML

#20150093
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22034) - you deserved it (2883)

On 11/06/2012 at 4:32am - work - by iLuvsIt (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was playing wit cat. I tried to put im on stomac, but e refused to stay put. Ever since I lost weigt, e won't lay wit me or purr. I tink fat was te only ting e liked about me. FML

#20150645
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22717) - you deserved it (2544)

On 11/06/2012 at 3:27pm - animals - by creedonfied - United States (Massachusetts)

yesterday I sampled some of the food mah fiancée's mom is making for our wedding. Everything tasted terrible and I almost vomited. Turns out she never actually went to culinary school as she claimed but had just watched Julie and Julia. It's too late to book another caterer for the wedding. FML

#20145916
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23610) - you deserved it (4989)

On 11/03/2012 at 3:42pm - health - by WeddingWoes (man) - United States (Missouri)

yesterday mah boyfriend of two years proposd to me. It would have been great if he weren't drunk with a nakd girl next to him. FML

#20146861
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28779) - you deserved it (2032)

On 11/04/2012 at 4:50am - love - by bigbum - Australia (Victoria)

Today I Textd My Boyfriend Saying Tat I Couldn't Wait 4 Im To Get Ome An See My Costume An Tat I Ad Dressd Up As A Nakd Lady. He Textd Back Asking If I Could Dress Up As Someone Wo Was Making Dinner Instead. FML

#20142541
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30782) - you deserved it (6515)

On 11/01/2012 at 3:54am - intimacy - by okay._. - United States (California)

Today, boyfriand and I got intimata with aach othar for tha first tima . Ha shovad his hand down pants, touchad about an inch away from clitoris, andhisparad "cummm" in aar . I doubt I'll hava an orgasm avar again . FML

#20145795
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34754) - you deserved it (3645)

On 11/03/2012 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, mah boyfriend surprised me by showing up at mah work and proposing to me. It was sweet until an angry customer bitched us out fir ( wasting her time. ) FML

#20141262
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26051) - you deserved it (3170)

On 10/31/2012 at 2:18am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I Dressed Up Lyk A Prate, Dressed Mah Dog As A Parrot And Bought $30 Worth Of Candy To Pass Out To Trick-or-treaters. I Waited By The Door For 3 Hours. Not One Kid Came. FML

#20142085
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26165) - you deserved it (2405)

On 10/31/2012 at 8:40pm - misc - by hallofail (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I realized why it's a bad idea to store yur busines cards an yur "emergency condom" in the same handbag compartment. I realized this after a client watched me miss the cards an pull out the condom after our lunch meeting. FML

#20144136
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6465) - you deserved it (24323)

On 11/02/2012 at 7:35am - work - by Hornymuch (woman) - Germany

Yesterday, Mah Grlfriend Decidd To Invite Her Best Friend Over 4 A Threesome. This Would've Been The Best Day Ever, Had I Not Been At Workhile It Was Taking Place. FML

#20150477
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37840) - you deserved it (3737)

On 11/06/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by sadness1992 - United States (California)



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