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Saturday 27 October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went out of my way to avoid street preachers thrusting hateful propaganda at me. A young woman ran up to me and started waving paper in my face, and I snapped at her to fuck off. Right afterwards I realised she was returning something that fell out of my pocket. She looked terrified. FML

#20133994
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8448) - you deserved it (33303)

On 10/26/2012 at 8:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my daughter told me that she wanted to convert to Christianity. Not because she has a strong relation with God, but because she wants to post Facebook statuses about Him and "get a lot of likes." FML

#20131695
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28394) - you deserved it (3541)

On 10/24/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went to the bar I've always gone to after work for the past 12 years. On arrival, I got banned for life, punched in the nose and thrown out. The barmaid comes out and says, "Sorry, wrong guy." FML

#20130988
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28456) - you deserved it (1765)

On 10/24/2012 at 6:51am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at a barbeque with my family, my boyfriend, and some mutual acquaintances. Someone jokingly called my boyfriend a pussy, to which he loudly replied, "I guess I am what I eat!" My mother was sitting across from us. FML

#20141794
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28172) - you deserved it (3909)

On 10/31/2012 at 4:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that my five-year-old daughters are deranged psychopaths, when one of them started screaming to get my attention while the other pulled the car door shut on my fingers. FML

#20134163
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24637) - you deserved it (3179)

On 10/26/2012 at 12:17pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I said "bless you" to a nice man who sneezed on the subway. That nice man has now followed me home and stood outside my apartment complex for two hours, claiming to be my "soulmate." FML

#20136351
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33302) - you deserved it (2687)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:22am - love - by prettylady? - United States

Today, my newly ex-fiancé, the father of my 5-year-old child, moved out of state with no warning. I just spent my last $500 paying off his car, and the rent is due tomorrow. FML

#20144316
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25806) - you deserved it (5863)

On 11/02/2012 at 12:35pm - love - by lilithfaye (woman) - United States

Today, I texted my boyfriend saying that I couldn't wait for him to get home and see my costume, and that I had dressed up as a naked lady. He texted back asking if I could dress up as someone who was making dinner instead. FML

#20142541
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34624) - you deserved it (7119)

On 11/01/2012 at 3:54am - intimacy - by okay._. - United States (California)

Today, I finally found a cute dress that hugged my curves and hid my imperfections. I wore it to my friend's house, and was feeling pretty good about myself, until some pregnant woman walked into the room wearing the exact same thing. It was a maternity dress. FML

#20128171
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27843) - you deserved it (6933)

On 10/22/2012 at 12:09pm - misc - by preggersmcgee (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML

#20139029
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25598) - you deserved it (3146)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:22pm - misc - by Indianagirl94 (woman) - United States

Today, I overheard my boyfriend and his friends talking in the next room. I smiled when my boyfriend called me beautiful, only to hear his friend laugh and say, "C'mon, dude. She has fat ankles and smells like deli meat." FML

#20127779
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27821) - you deserved it (3762)

On 10/22/2012 at 1:29am - love - by sausagefingers (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I met someone really cool and their departing words were, for some odd reason, "We should totally be friends, I mean unless you're schizophrenic or something, haha!" I have schizophrenia. FML

#20140639
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29230) - you deserved it (2278)

On 10/30/2012 at 7:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I babysat a 10-year-old and we played Pokémon. It was my first time playing, so he showed me. I ended up winning and the kid started crying and told his parents he hated me. They decided not to pay me for the night, and now I'm out of a job. FML

#20130128
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25565) - you deserved it (4645)

On 10/23/2012 at 6:00pm - kids - by Pokemon problems - Canada (Ontario)



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