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Saturday 27 October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I overheard my boyfriend and his friends talking in the next room. I smiled when my boyfriend called me beautiful, only to hear his friend laugh and say, "C'mon, dude. She has fat ankles and smells like deli meat." FML

#20127779
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26972) - you deserved it (3677)

On 10/22/2012 at 1:29am - love - by sausagefingers (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and I asked him to call me something sweet. He called me Honey Boo Boo. FML

Today, after I gave birth to our first child, my husband looked at the doctor and seriously asked, "When do you circumcise the baby?" We had a baby girl. FML

#20138333
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25559) - you deserved it (2425)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get me toilet paper. My grandpa slips a small leaf under the door and says, "This is what I used in my day." FML

#20140057
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25218) - you deserved it (4329)

On 10/30/2012 at 10:27am - misc - by Obi1Shinobi - United States

Today, I met someone really cool and their departing words were, for some odd reason, "We should totally be friends, I mean unless you're schizophrenic or something, haha!" I have schizophrenia. FML

#20140639
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28271) - you deserved it (2197)

On 10/30/2012 at 7:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I babysat a 10-year-old and we played Pokémon. It was my first time playing, so he showed me. I ended up winning and the kid started crying and told his parents he hated me. They decided not to pay me for the night, and now I'm out of a job. FML

#20130128
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22254) - you deserved it (4308)

On 10/23/2012 at 6:00pm - kids - by Pokemon problems - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned that despite having told them two years ago, my parents still aren't accepting of me being gay. I found this out when my mom called and asked if I was "cured" yet. FML

#20131666
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28551) - you deserved it (5162)

On 10/24/2012 at 6:43pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, it's the five year anniversary of the day I broke up with my girlfriend to see other people. I've not had sex a single time since. FML

#20134961
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13504) - you deserved it (59644)

On 10/27/2012 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Cslouth - United States (New York)

Today, while at work being a waitress, I gave my customer his credit card receipt to sign. Instead of giving him a pen, I pulled a tampon out of my apron pocket and handed it to him. FML

#20135099
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26324) - you deserved it (7394)

On 10/27/2012 at 2:42am - work - by geena - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me by saying, "It's not you, it's me. I have a terrible taste in women." FML

#20140004
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29654) - you deserved it (3058)

On 10/30/2012 at 9:27am - love - by LonelyMe -

Today, I told my dad and brother that I want to take Zumba classes. My brother said, "Did you hear that? Pumbaa wants to Zumba!" Then he starting dancing and making pig noises. My dad high-fived him. When my mom heard, she high-fived him too. FML

#20141343
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26247) - you deserved it (3329)

On 10/31/2012 at 6:06am - misc - by hakuna matata - United States (California)

Today, I was fired for actively seeking employment with another company. Because of having just been fired, the other company will no longer give me the time of day. FML

#20132895
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21576) - you deserved it (4259)

On 10/25/2012 at 4:13pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized why it's a bad idea to store your business cards and your "emergency condom" in the same handbag compartment. I realized this after a client watched me miss the cards and pull out the condom after our lunch meeting. FML

#20144136
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7204) - you deserved it (26342)

On 11/02/2012 at 7:35am - work - by Hornymuch (woman) - Germany



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