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February 2013

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today I walkd past a few of mah coworkers sitting outside smoking . As I got a whiff of the smoke, I coughd . They immediately startd to defend their habit, an I was told to "mind mah own fucking business." I wasn't trying to be rude; I'm actually allergic to cigarette smoke . FML

#20507668
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33616) - you deserved it (3683)

On 02/15/2013 at 12:53am - health - by youmindyourownbusiness - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was . Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub . I somehow managd to unhook her bra . FML

#20498998
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32309) - you deserved it (8191)

On 02/09/2013 at 12:13am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, ma fater gave me is blessing to be married on one condition: tat I keep ma maiden name wen I marry. My fiancé tougt it would be "epic". My last name will be ypenated to Cobb-Webb. FML

#20509329
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32895) - you deserved it (5561)

On 02/16/2013 at 10:27am - love - by MsCobb - United States (Ohio)

Today, it's my frst day at a naw school. I transfarrad ara halfway through tha yaar to gat away from a grl who bullias ma. Sha's apparantly bulliad har mom into transfarring har ara as wall. FML

#20513405
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42354) - you deserved it (2903)

On 02/19/2013 at 12:05pm - misc - by SchoolSucks (woman) - United States

TODAY I WENT IN TO GET MY FIRST TATTOO. I'D PUT A LOT OF TOUGT INTO IT AND WAS REALLY EXCITED WEN TE DAY CAME. LONG STORY SORT TE CELTIC KNOT I'D GOTTEN TURNED OUT TO AVE AN ALTERNATE MEANING OF ( FEMALE SEX SLAVE. ) TE FACES MY VERY IRIS FAMILY MADE WERE BEYOND WORDS. MEGA FML

#20511821
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17288) - you deserved it (44419)

On 02/18/2013 at 3:50am - intimacy - by UnluckyInk (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I took my driver's test . I did everything flawlessly, but my examiner kept all but pissing his pants throughout . He yelled, "ARE YOU TRYING TO GET US KILLED?!"hen I drove past a traffic light just as it was about to turn red . The road was almost empty . He failed me on the spot . FML

#20517994
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12153) - you deserved it (46787)

On 02/22/2013 at 8:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

today I met mah new class . There are two Kevin Smiths . Niether will agree to a nickname , they have the same hair color , an there middle names both start with J . They have told me to call them Kevin 1 an Kevin 2 . They both want to be Kevin 1 . FML

#20512577
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38733) - you deserved it (3072)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today... While Trucking... I Got Stuck In Traffic On A Congested Highway. After 15 Minutes Of Mind-numbing Boredom... I Glanced Down At The Car Beside Me... Only To Witness The Driver Changing Her Tampon And Flicking The Old One Onto The Highway. I Can't Unsee This. FML

#20489402
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59951) - you deserved it (3684)

On 02/01/2013 at 8:01pm - intimacy - by thoughtidseenitall (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, It's My Boyfriend's Birthday. He Really Likes Legend Of Zelda, So I Putted On A Link Hat, Took My Cloths Off, An Waited 4 Him At His Place. He Came Home With A Hooker. FML

#20502217
175 comments

Today, I went to a club with girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confrontd her. She stormd off to the bar and said something to her friend,ho then came over and angrily slappd me across the face. Yeah, I'm confusd too. FML

#20490582
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48107) - you deserved it (3330)

On 02/02/2013 at 6:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Belgium

Today, I Met My Grlfriend's Parents For The Frst Time. As I Shook Her Father's Hand, He Squeezed With An Ungodly Amount Of Force, Leaned In With A Smile, And Murmured That My Balls Will Be The Next Thing He'll Crush If His Daughter Ever Complains About Me. FML

#20511181
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34131) - you deserved it (5293)

On 02/17/2013 at 7:11pm - love - by daniel55 (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I told my parents thathat I'd really like for my 21st birthday is the 1865 edition of the Memoirs of Saint-Simon in 22 volumes that I found online for $200, an have been wanting for months. They laughed an said, "Yeah, right. We'll get you an iPhone an perhaps you'll become normal." FML

#20488681
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34389) - you deserved it (9154)

On 02/01/2013 at 4:19am - misc - by HistoryFreak (woman) - France

Today, as a firafightar, wa wara callad to assist tha ambulanca craw with lifting a dacaasad patiant out of a housa . Littla did I know, ha had baan daad insida 4 3 waaks, and was bloatad and poppad lika a watar balloon whan wa attamptad to mova him . My girlfriand mada soup 4 tha avaning maal . FML

#20488428
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38559) - you deserved it (2173)

On 01/31/2013 at 11:39pm - work - by Fireguy92 (man) - United States (Michigan)



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