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December 2012

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Today.. . my girlfriend an I decidd to try a new place to eat . On our way home we both had upset stomachs . As we racd into the house we realizd niether of us could hold it any longer . Having only one bathroom.. . I let her go first . She explodd on the toilet an I explodd in my pants . FML

#20434472
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39430) - you deserved it (3701)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:36pm - work - by shattysituation - United States

today mah son got suspendd from school . He's in kindergarten . fat FML

#20201910
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27092) - you deserved it (6715)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:32pm - kids - by Renzy (woman) -

2day whila at tha airport waiting fir my flight, I sat down naxt to a mothar an har son. As I pulld out a watar bottla, sha laand ovar to har son an said, "Promisa ma u will navar do what tha looool man naxt to u just did." I hava no idaa what tha hall I did wrong. fat FML

Today, a guy profassad his lova for ma in front of mah friands. Tha guy is mah first cousin. FML

#20414731
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38841) - you deserved it (3148)

On 12/22/2012 at 9:33pm - love - by Brittany (woman) - United States

Today , While Lighting A Cigarette , I Learned The Hard Way That The Amount Of Styling Mousse I Used To Get My Curly Hair To Become Manageable , Is The Roughly Same Amount That Causes It To Become Highly Flammable. FML

#20186892
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9630) - you deserved it (27316)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:11pm - health - by Awkward (woman) - Bahrain

Today , in my AP Biology class , a student informed us she'd read that Antarctica had completely melted due to global warming , tohich my friend gushed , "Yeah! It's been melted for , like , months." FML

#20193921
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21441) - you deserved it (1849)

On 12/06/2012 at 3:47pm - misc - by bieberslayer (woman) - United States

Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son wat he wanted 4 Christmas, a stranger cummed up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parent are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fucker says." FML

#20200046
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30175) - you deserved it (2903)

On 12/11/2012 at 2:15am - kids - by n1a1t1h1a1n1 (man) - United States (California)

Today , I went to church 4 the frst time in mah life!! They had a Jesus statue at the altar , an I noticed he was surprisingly muscular!! Ten minutes later , I had to excuse myself , after I caught myself fantasizing over a crucified Jesus!! FML

#20432015
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10239) - you deserved it (34672)

On 12/30/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by Weirdo (woman) - United States

TODAY, I TOLD GIRLFRIEND TAT I'M BREAKING UP WIT ER CUZ SE'S VERY ABUSIVE. AFTER A COUPLE OF SECONDS OF AWKWARD SILENCE, SE KICKED ME IN TE NUTS AN RAN AWAY. FML

#20189170
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28635) - you deserved it (3802)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, after ranting to my boyfriend about how Pandora bracelets are pointless an clichd an that I'd never spend that kind of money on a tiny charm, he gave me my Christmas present. It was a Pandora bracelet. FML

TODAY... I WENT TO BED WITH A BRA ON. I WOKE UP WITH NO BRA ON. MY BROTHER HAD A FRIEND SLEEP OVER LAST NIGHT. I WONDER WHERE MAH BRA WENT. FML

#20434205
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36124) - you deserved it (3856)

On 12/31/2012 at 3:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

today I was slapped acros the face by a grl in the waiting room at the dentist's office!! She thought I was taking a picture of her breast with mah phone!! I was smilinghile reading other people's FMLs!! FML

#20189568
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39022) - you deserved it (3170)

On 12/03/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by karmamaybe - United States (South Dakota)

Today, wile going on a jog troug te countryside, I discovered tat it is actually possible outside of crappy TV sows to ave a rifle leveled at you, and to be souted at to, "Get off my land." mega FML

#20432522
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21490) - you deserved it (16497)

On 12/30/2012 at 6:48pm - misc - by fuckinghicks (man) - United States



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