Today, I was told I look like a Simpson. I don't have blond hair, or any of the features of them. So I asked which one. I was told Homer because we both could use Weight Watchers and an education. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12666) - you deserved it (2594)
On 11/09/2012 at 1:57am - misc - by Kyle - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was singing in the shower, when some suds from my shampoo fell into my mouth and down my throat. I retched and sputtered for about two minutes before finally throwing up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14051) - you deserved it (6180)
On 11/17/2012 at 3:45am - health - by woman - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I called off my engagement, after finding out my fiancé is cheating on me. I recently started a new job, and in anticipation of getting married, I asked that my username include his surname. They can't be changed, so now I get to log in every day under that sorry bastard's surname. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19779) - you deserved it (7311)
On 11/20/2012 at 12:22pm - love - by notAMrs (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I had surgery on my arm. My mom has recently had the same surgery and my dad is having his first rib removed and won't be able to move his arm. My family combined now has three functioning arms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16655) - you deserved it (1147)
On 11/01/2012 at 1:08am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)
Today, I worked up the courage to give a guy my number. I wrote it down on a piece of paper, tore it in half and gave it to him. Later, I noticed I'd given him the wrong, blank half. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13565) - you deserved it (7085)
On 11/01/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I'm in the hospital and it's been 44 hours since I've eaten anything. My doctors won't let me eat and my parents are sitting across the room, eating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16918) - you deserved it (1090)
On 11/20/2012 at 6:25pm - health - by RayneSong - United States (Michigan)
Today, after being single for a while now, I unwillingly went on a blind date with a guy my friend convinced me would be perfect for me. He took me to McDonald's; his father was with him the whole entire time. He is 27. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17648) - you deserved it (1257)
On 11/26/2012 at 10:13pm - love - by N - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Today, I told my boss that I quit, and handed in my two week's notice. A couple of hours later, I found my letter of resignation had been photocopied and copies hung all around the office with "Best day ever" written on the bottom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16461) - you deserved it (4020)
On 11/24/2012 at 6:54am - work - by sad face - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I gave a big presentation at work, hoping to impress my boss and angle for a promotion. I was already nervous, but a co-worker at the back kept making goofy faces, causing me to repeatedly break into laughter. My boss accused me of being high, and suspended me on the spot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14127) - you deserved it (2280)
On 11/02/2012 at 8:23pm - work - by YOUFUCKINGFUCKSOCK (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)
Today, I was rejected for a dream photography job that involves travelling all over the world, because according to the interviewer, half the photos in my nature portfolio were "blatantly photoshopped." I guess reality isn't realistic enough for some people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18320) - you deserved it (1017)
On 11/23/2012 at 8:29pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, at the age of 29, I now have a relationship on par with a teenager's. Several weeks ago, my fiancé and I lost our home, and are now back living with our respective families. We now have no privacy. I actually just got dropped off at home, before 10, after having sex in a hay field. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21033) - you deserved it (2608)
On 11/19/2012 at 12:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I arrived home after a hard day's work to see my 12-year-old sister had greased up my 8-year-old brother with butter and olive oil, and was attempting to slide him down the wooden floorboards in the hallway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13844) - you deserved it (1274)
On 11/13/2012 at 5:00am - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)
Today, my girlfriend decided to break the news that she wanted us to be "just friends." However, she did it not in just any old way - while ice-skating. I'm currently in hospital getting stitches in my arm after I tripped in shock and she ran me over. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15813) - you deserved it (827)
On 11/22/2012 at 12:35am - love - by Ice cold (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Monday 17 June 2013
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