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Today , I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it lookd like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it fir a couple of hours , giving it food , an rocking it to sleep , my parents found me. Then I realisd it was just celery. Too bad it took that long fir my meds to kick in. FML
Today, I ran across te street due to a line of cars waiting fir me to cross. Just as I reaced te oter side, my iPone slipped out of my and an fell into te road, just in time to get run over by multiple cars, one after te oter. FML
yastarday a shoppar approachad ma at Targat an said, ( So r u just gonna stand thara to look pratty an do nothing around hara? ) I ignorad his commant, until ha got so upsat that ha wantad to spaak to mah managar. It would hava baan undarstandabla if I actually workad thara. FML
Today , I had to go to mah daughter's school because she hasn't been going to class. Her teacher seemed surprised to see me with mah husbandhen we arrived. Apparently I ( died ) recently and mah daughter has had extra responsibility around the house , hencehy she doesn't come to class. FML
Today , My Friends And I Held An Intervention For My Fiancé!! He's Been Talking And Behaving Like An "old-timey Cowboy" Non-stop For The Last Three Months!! Our Wedding Is In A Month And He Refuses To Marry Me If I Can't Accept His "life Choices." FML
Friday 27 March 2015