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November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went to a big job interview. Everything went well at first, with the interviewer being impressed by my CV. I was then interrogated over not having a Facebook account, and practically accused of being a criminal, because people without them "always have something to hide". FML

#20165792
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19261) - you deserved it (1320)

On 11/16/2012 at 6:59pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by waking him up with a blowjob, because he had always told me that it was a sexy fantasy of his. When he finally woke up, he got pissed off, rudely accused me of interrupting his beauty sleep, then soundly lay back down and fell asleep again. FML

#20169340
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27575) - you deserved it (3378)

On 11/19/2012 at 10:12am - intimacy - by nextcontestant16 - United States

Today, after I spent two hours trying to teach my girlfriend to play sudoku, she broke up with me, tearfully claiming that I'd made up a fake, imaginary game to make her feel stupid. FML

#20167793
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29049) - you deserved it (2993)

On 11/18/2012 at 7:13am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, multiple people admired my elaborate face paint. This happens every Halloween, at least every Halloween since I got badly burnt in a car accident. FML

#20142623
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38533) - you deserved it (1436)

On 11/01/2012 at 7:17am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull, City of)

Today, the battery cables on my car came loose, thus resetting my car's electronics to factory settings. The anti-theft system is now turned on, and I can't start my car with it on. Luckily, it turns off with a remote. The remote broke about six months ago. FML

Today, my girlfriend started bawling, saying that our relationship wouldn't work. Why? Because if Justin and Selena can't do it, no one can. FML

#20178699
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25329) - you deserved it (2929)

On 11/25/2012 at 7:55pm - love - by nonbelieber (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I witnessed a robbery as a teenager ran out of a Walgreens with stolen goods in his hands. The manager was running after him. Trying to be helpful, I pulled forward to block the thief from getting away. The cops showed up and arrested me for hitting a pedestrian. FML

#20169022
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22552) - you deserved it (4234)

On 11/19/2012 at 1:18am - misc - by ausmill12 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, after losing twenty pounds to please my husband, the only comment I received was, "At least now only your personality sucks." FML

#20143873
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26941) - you deserved it (4315)

On 11/02/2012 at 12:17am - love - by 123alleyesonme - United States (Texas)

Today, I took a pregnancy test. When I saw that the result was positive, I started crying and showed my mom. She burst out laughing and told me that I had taken an ovulation test. FML

#20177960
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6878) - you deserved it (28073)

On 11/25/2012 at 10:08am - health - by I'm stupid - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized that the bird I supposedly heard during the night throughout my childhood is actually the sound my mom makes when she comes. FML

#20160628
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35952) - you deserved it (2470)

On 11/12/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by Heather - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was giving my son a driving lesson. He blatantly ran a red light, so I told him to pull over to let me drive us home. As I walked over to the driver-side door, he instead locked me out and drove off by himself. FML

#20156278
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23926) - you deserved it (6133)

On 11/09/2012 at 1:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Argentina (Buenos Aires)

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find that while I was passed out someone stole my prosthetic leg. FML

#20160279
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28697) - you deserved it (5415)

On 11/12/2012 at 10:10am - health - by poserpilot - United States (California)

Today, my friends and I went out to dinner. Being short on cash, I suggested a game where we put our phones in the center of the table and first to check their phone had to pay the bill. Our conversation died out, and fearful of having an awkward silence, I checked my phone. FML

#20160706
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5059) - you deserved it (44792)

On 11/12/2012 at 5:08pm - money - by dgilbs - United States (Michigan)



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