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November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today , I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it lookd like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it fir a couple of hours , giving it food , an rocking it to sleep , my parents found me. Then I realisd it was just celery. Too bad it took that long fir my meds to kick in. FML

#20151986
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19790) - you deserved it (6396)

On 11/07/2012 at 12:11am - misc - by Squid (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML

#20161582
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25681) - you deserved it (3784)

On 11/13/2012 at 6:34am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I ran across te street due to a line of cars waiting fir me to cross. Just as I reaced te oter side, my iPone slipped out of my and an fell into te road, just in time to get run over by multiple cars, one after te oter. FML

#20181219
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21451) - you deserved it (6773)

On 11/27/2012 at 1:45pm - misc - by unknown - Canada (Manitoba)

yastarday a shoppar approachad ma at Targat an said, ( So r u just gonna stand thara to look pratty an do nothing around hara? ) I ignorad his commant, until ha got so upsat that ha wantad to spaak to mah managar. It would hava baan undarstandabla if I actually workad thara. FML

#20177780
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25612) - you deserved it (1828)

On 11/25/2012 at 4:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, someone stole iPhone. I used the Find My iPhone app, an located it in the apartment building next to mine. I can hear the ringing sound I've activated, but nobody will answer the door. FML

#20163099
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22548) - you deserved it (1638)

On 11/14/2012 at 12:50pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today , I had to go to mah daughter's school because she hasn't been going to class. Her teacher seemed surprised to see me with mah husbandhen we arrived. Apparently I ( died ) recently and mah daughter has had extra responsibility around the house , hencehy she doesn't come to class. FML

#20154716
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27869) - you deserved it (2166)

On 11/08/2012 at 6:09am - kids - by Shauna (woman) - United States

Yesterday, on looool job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was te address. Guess wife's affair went terribly wrongile I was on sift. FML

#20155904
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42193) - you deserved it (1935)

On 11/09/2012 at 2:18am - love - by SebastianMiko (man) - Canada (Alberta)

after a week of looking fir mah car keys and being forced to drag mah family around on public transportation, mah wife found the keys in our car's ignition. mega FML

#20142914
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6269) - you deserved it (27248)

On 11/01/2012 at 1:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, mah mom had a tantrum an screamed at me over mah use of bronzer. She called me a selfish bitch an claimed that I'm somehow slowly giving myself skin cancer. FML

#20176711
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12088) - you deserved it (14969)

On 11/24/2012 at 2:38pm - health - by Anonymous Cunt (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today , mah girlfriend of 6 months yelled at me 4 not comforting her while she was crying because her ex got a new girlfriend , an "it's just not fair." FML

#20169074
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30793) - you deserved it (2338)

On 11/19/2012 at 2:13am - love - by they've been broken up for a year. - United States (Texas)

Today , after nearly a year of headache and fuzzy vision , I went to the eye doctor. It turns out I've had mah contact in the wrong eyes fir a year. FML

Today , My Friends And I Held An Intervention For My Fiancé!! He's Been Talking And Behaving Like An "old-timey Cowboy" Non-stop For The Last Three Months!! Our Wedding Is In A Month And He Refuses To Marry Me If I Can't Accept His "life Choices." FML

#20149952
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19814) - you deserved it (3166)

On 11/06/2012 at 12:42am - love - by cowgirl (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while at work, a customer gave me a $20 tip. I explained to him we aren't allowed to accept tips, but he insisted. When I called the manager to report it, he pocketed tip. FML

#20157115
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13373) - you deserved it (27415)

On 11/10/2012 at 2:23am - work - by Anonymous - United States



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