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October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while at a pool party, I found out the reason I got my new, white bikini at such a bargain price; it goes completely transparent when wet. I only realized this after everyone was staring at me and whistling. FML

#20119331
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22985) - you deserved it (12302)

On 10/16/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by bargainshopper (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I woke up with a used condom on my face. Turns out my roommate had sex with his girlfriend during the night and instead of getting up and throwing it away, he decided to throw it across the room. FML

#20098094
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37686) - you deserved it (2645)

On 10/02/2012 at 7:52am - intimacy - by Jake (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, after weeks of coming home to find my furniture all tipped over, thinking the place was haunted, and accepting my boyfriend's offers to come over and "comfort" me, I came home from work early. I found my boyfriend in the kitchen, kicking over all the chairs. FML

#20116490
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21928) - you deserved it (8350)

On 10/14/2012 at 1:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Estonia

Today, I purchased a brand new television. Not long after the professional who hung it on my wall left, it came crashing down on my hardwood floor. I'm now left with a busted TV, a tear in my living room wall, and a severely drained bank account. FML

#20125611
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25294) - you deserved it (2682)

On 10/20/2012 at 6:48pm - money - by fuck gangnam style in the anus - United States (California)

Today, my four roommates and I contracted lice. While all our heads were slathered in mayonnaise and saran wrap, our building's fire alarm went off. FML

#20103879
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24581) - you deserved it (3351)

On 10/06/2012 at 3:28am - health - by EastOneTen - United States

Today, I went on a field trip with some people from school. I'm currently confined to a wheelchair, so I had to rely on my sister to get around. She eventually went off with her friends, assuming that the people nearby would keep me company. Five minutes later, they'd all left me. FML

#20135712
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26018) - you deserved it (1931)

On 10/27/2012 at 4:04pm - misc - by left4dead (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I fell down the stairs. Lying on my back in extreme pain, I called my mom for help. When she came over, she said I looked like a dead bug, took a picture and posted it on Facebook. FML

#20118333
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25392) - you deserved it (2290)

On 10/15/2012 at 5:38pm - health - by Bug (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my daughter's "pen pal" is really a 58-year-old man in prison. FML

#20109821
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27497) - you deserved it (3003)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:59pm - kids - by ohgod. - United States (Florida)

Today, I caught my brother whacking off with my expensive bottle of lotion. This might not have been quite so disturbing had he not been caught with his entire penis in the bottle. FML

#20117813
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37293) - you deserved it (2878)

On 10/15/2012 at 8:10am - intimacy - by scarred_sibling - United States

Today, I went on a bad first date and the guy was more into it than me. I tried to scare him away by only speaking in robot voice, with robot arms. He thought it was adorable, and told me I reminded him of his mother. FML

#20098216
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14299) - you deserved it (27025)

On 10/02/2012 at 10:42am - love - by Queso Dog (woman) - Japan

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has secretly been conditioning me to get turned on by the smell of bananas. Guess whose new co-worker peels a nice, fragrant banana five times a day. FML

#20139261
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32699) - you deserved it (3151)

On 10/29/2012 at 8:42pm - intimacy - by SadExperiment (man) - United States (California)

Today, while looking through the camera my boyfriend got me, I found a video of a girl giving him head. After screaming at him about it and breaking up with him, I realized the girl was a drunken me. FML

#20119129
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11173) - you deserved it (64451)

On 10/16/2012 at 1:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking with my boyfriend when a guy walked up to me and told me I look exactly like Taylor Swift. My boyfriend punched him in the face and told him that Taylor Swift is a lot more attractive. I'm actually considering leaving him for the complete stranger. FML

#20130143
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34347) - you deserved it (2993)

On 10/23/2012 at 6:12pm - misc - by jeanrose2013 - United States (Arkansas)



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