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October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, a customer handed me a 100 dollar bill. He then told me that it was my tip for doing a good job. He snatched it away just as I touched it, laughed, and said, "Just kidding." He then took his money and left the store. FML

#20109681
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24461) - you deserved it (2209)

On 10/09/2012 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was cleaning out my roof's gutter, which was full of leaves. There was an especially big pile, and when I started scooping it up, I felt something squishy. Turns out those leaves were covering the remains of a rotting squirrel. I can't stop smelling it. FML

#20141617
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23570) - you deserved it (1761)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:23pm - animals - by orilykid (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got a job babysitting two really sweet kids. When their parents left, they told me that their cat had died. I told them how sorry I was, to which one of them replied, "That's okay. We still have him in a box. Wanna see?" FML

#20123166
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20227) - you deserved it (1763)

On 10/18/2012 at 9:57pm - kids - by Jessica - United States

Today, my mother told me that my dead grandmother speaks to her. How? When she's thinking of her while brushing her teeth, her electric toothbrush will suddenly stop buzzing and this tells her her mother is communicating with her. FML

#20127529
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19247) - you deserved it (1579)

On 10/21/2012 at 10:52pm - misc - by smdh - United States

Today, I was sitting in the park with my new dog; I got her from the pound last week. We were enjoying the sun when I noticed that every time a black person walked past, she'd bark like crazy. Great, my dog is a racist. FML

#20097984
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28033) - you deserved it (2922)

On 10/02/2012 at 3:10am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got a phone call from my 6-year-old son's school telling me they were concerned about him as he wouldn't stop barking at the radiator. After talking to my husband about it, I found out he's been teaching him so he could see the look on my face. FML

#20121395
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20327) - you deserved it (1831)

On 10/17/2012 at 7:00pm - kids - by Uproar - Iceland

Today, I was complimented for having amazingly lifelike warts as part of my witch costume, and was asked how I achieved the effect so well. I didn't have the heart to admit they were just my pimples under green makeup. FML

#20138696
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21448) - you deserved it (2032)

On 10/29/2012 at 2:42pm - misc - by mistickfae - United States

Today, I passed out while I was with my boyfriend in his garden. I woke up on the concrete just outside his house. Apparently, he'd tried to carry me in, but because he was too weak, he gave up and went to watch TV. FML

#20131269
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25700) - you deserved it (3336)

On 10/24/2012 at 12:52pm - love - by Alice - United Kingdom

Today, I saw my music teacher, who I considered one of my role-models, on TV. Too bad it was because she'd robbed a church. FML

#20128657
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21677) - you deserved it (1729)

On 10/22/2012 at 6:51pm - misc - by musicthief - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a co-worker gave me a couple of CDs he said he wanted me to listen to. I got excited, thinking that they were playlists he'd made for me. They were self-help tracks. FML

#20104274
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19211) - you deserved it (2211)

On 10/06/2012 at 1:09pm - work - by The Last Cockbender (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while in a pharmacy, I walked over to the shaving cream aisle. I picked up a can to smell it and unknowingly pushed the button, spraying an old guy in front of me. He freaked out and started telling everyone that the ceiling above him was leaking. FML

#20139053
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10024) - you deserved it (15612)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:39pm - misc - by IndianAngel96 - United States (Texas)

Today, I was babysitting, and we were playing a game. Because he was little, I let him win all the games. He then turned to me and said, "You're really bad at this." I got very defensive and won the next game, and was actually proud that I beat a 3-year-old. FML

#20117136
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17828) - you deserved it (7965)

On 10/14/2012 at 8:45pm - kids - by amiliaroberts123 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, a clown came over for my son's 8th birthday party. There was a moment of silence then laughter as everyone realized the clown and I were wearing the same plaid shirt. FML

#20117322
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23321) - you deserved it (4493)

On 10/14/2012 at 10:24pm - kids - by Randolph (man) - United States (Florida)



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