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September 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my teacher told me that she couldn't find my hand-written essay on the Renaissance, and that I have to re-do it all by tomorrow. I later saw my essay on her desk, covered in a massive coffee stain that made virtually everything unreadable. FML

#20076161
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22059) - you deserved it (1050)

On 09/17/2012 at 12:05pm - work - by Anonymous - France

Today, during a family dinner, my favourite underwire bra got tired of its job and tried to shish-kebab my boobs. FML

#20065022
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14174) - you deserved it (1264)

On 09/09/2012 at 5:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I stumbled across "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo" on TV and realized that these awful freaks are going to make more money than I ever will. FML

#20070573
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18688) - you deserved it (1696)

On 09/13/2012 at 6:29pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, for the third day in a row, my 10-month-old is refusing to eat any of the meals that I prepare for him. He will however eat anything semi-edible lying on the floor, cat kibble included. FML

#20061876
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12744) - you deserved it (1304)

On 09/07/2012 at 2:19pm - kids - by amusedslovenia (woman) - Slovenia

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after months of believing my house is haunted, and years of being scared of the dark, I finally had to admit to myself that the only way I can go to the bathroom in the middle of the night is if my cat follows me and sits outside the door. I'm 23. FML

#20084083
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13032) - you deserved it (5957)

On 09/22/2012 at 8:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I spent hours crafting a tiara to look like the princess from my boyfriend's favourite game series, Zelda. I sent him a picture of me wearing it, and got the reply: "Sure, that's nice, but you'd be better as Majora." FML

#20079245
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12958) - you deserved it (2117)

On 09/19/2012 at 1:25pm - love - by MT (woman) - Finland

Today, I told a girl that she had very pretty eyes. I then had to rinse pepper spray from my own. FML

#20059533
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16613) - you deserved it (1503)

On 09/05/2012 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, after math class, the resident creepy kid approached me and asked me out. I've only spoken to him twice before, so I was creeped out, and I politely declined. He totally lost it, and shouted that I'm a "friend-zoning bitch" before storming out of the room. FML

#20072034
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16330) - you deserved it (2213)

On 09/14/2012 at 8:03pm - love - by wow kid just leave me alone (woman) - United States

Today, I got fired for saving my company upwards of $6,000. I'm as confused as you are. FML

#20075906
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20938) - you deserved it (1297)

On 09/17/2012 at 6:46am - work - by Grindwhore - Canada (British Columbia)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I realized how much it sucks to have the same name as my dad when I overheard my mom moan his name in bed. FML

#20062873
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32259) - you deserved it (1685)

On 09/08/2012 at 7:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my thirteen-year-old daughter tried to scratch the freckles off of her face. We ended up going to the hospital. FML

#20067114
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17108) - you deserved it (1820)

On 09/11/2012 at 12:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my mother rubbing one out. For the third time. I then had to explain to her, also for the third time, why pleasuring herself in the living room is inappropriate. FML

#20071176
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27715) - you deserved it (1482)

On 09/14/2012 at 1:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML

#20071956
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17425) - you deserved it (1859)

On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)



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