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September 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my book bag was so heavy that it set off my car's passenger detection system in the front seat. I had to buckle in my textbooks. FML

#20068805
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26590) - you deserved it (3633)

On 09/12/2012 at 12:05pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I realized just how bad my 28-year-old husband's gamer rage is when I came home to a smashed TV. This is the second TV in three months that he's destroyed. FML

#20080513
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23216) - you deserved it (4158)

On 09/20/2012 at 8:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was waiting for my wife in a mall when some kids came and sat near me, wearing band t-shirts. I recognized some, as I was into The Smiths and Black Flag in my youth. I tried to strike up a music-fan chat with them. "Fuck off, grandad" and "Ew, pedo" is all I got in return. FML

#20087854
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26585) - you deserved it (4575)

On 09/25/2012 at 7:54am - kids - by HenryRollinsForPresident (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I had three things stolen: my phone, my iPod, and my girlfriend. All by the same guy. FML

#20094866
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34400) - you deserved it (2771)

On 09/30/2012 at 8:56am - love - by Shortround - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to get my nails done for the first time in a while. I don't like to go that much because two of my toes are connected, and I'm very self-conscious about it. The man painting my toes started laughing when he saw them and called all the other employees over to look. FML

#20075771
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31262) - you deserved it (2390)

On 09/17/2012 at 2:32am - misc - by twinkletoes (woman) - United States

Today, I was feeling depressed and got very, very drunk. This evening, I was feeling equally desperate, and ended up having to get my special dildo removed from my asshole at the hospital. FML

#20051425
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13907) - you deserved it (38666)

On 08/31/2012 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by pride? what's that? :( (woman) - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)

Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML

#20052962
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21494) - you deserved it (50593)

On 09/01/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by WhyAppleWhy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I bought some bitter-apple spray to stop my puppy chewing on everything. Later, I found out how effective it was, when I tried to eat a sandwich, and gagged at the horrifying taste on my hands. My dog seems unaffected, and continues to chew the table legs. FML

#20057573
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22067) - you deserved it (3970)

On 09/04/2012 at 4:34pm - animals - by badwolf (man) - United States

Today, a creepy girl from my class wouldn't stop texting me and trying to call me. In order to get her to stop, I texted back saying that I was at my mom's house for a family dinner. She replied, "No you're not. I can see you right now." FML

#20069063
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36385) - you deserved it (4125)

On 09/12/2012 at 5:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I decided to give blood for the first time in my life. As an 18-year-old, 5'1", 110lb woman, I guess I shouldn't have been allowed there, much less permitted to leave the room to get some food. I ended up passing out in the middle of the dining hall. FML

Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend sighed, said "I can't do this any more" and pulled out. After repeatedly asking him what was wrong, he basically told me that I suck in bed. Apparently, the way I "just lie there" makes him feel like a necrophile. FML

#20092519
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14072) - you deserved it (48593)

On 09/28/2012 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada

Today, I took a pregnancy test. I was disappointed it was negative, as my fiancé and I have been together for four years and have a strong relationship. He danced with happiness when he discovered the test was negative and tried to high-five me. FML

#20094767
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14524) - you deserved it (26030)

On 09/30/2012 at 5:30am - love - by BeforeItWasCool - United Kingdom

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. Yesterday, I finally came to my senses and started using birth control. FML

#20074444
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9125) - you deserved it (57023)

On 09/16/2012 at 11:32am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)



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