Today, I was washing dishes when I picked up a plate and saw a huge spider. Trying to be nice, I took the plate outside and tried to gently push the spider off. The wind blew it into my eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22553) - you deserved it (3667)
On 02/25/2012 at 10:13pm - misc - by baconandkittens (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I had a technical skill test as a nurse. My objective was to help the patient defecate, but my opening sentence came out as: "Hello, I'm Jan. I'm here to help you take a shit." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15720) - you deserved it (7032)
On 02/08/2012 at 10:24pm - work - by Silver_Samurai (man) - Netherlands
Today, I woke up next to my boyfriend of two years. I realized I was going to be late for work, so I asked him to hand me my underwear. I had never seen the underwear he gave me before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30673) - you deserved it (2844)
On 02/22/2012 at 2:21pm - intimacy - by vsshopper (woman) - United States (California)
Today, we got a new seating arrangement in my science class. I'm now sitting between two people who have spent the last 20 minutes whispering dirty things to one another. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20093) - you deserved it (1863)
On 02/08/2012 at 1:15pm - love - by Anonymous -
Today, my husband started a food fight. During our wedding reception. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22843) - you deserved it (4188)
On 02/09/2012 at 10:17am - love - by Zoey (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I decided to quit smoking. My wife conveniently decided on the same day that she was going to start smoking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20374) - you deserved it (2131)
On 02/15/2012 at 12:50pm - health - by TerribleAddiction - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I realized that I probably have anger issues. I came to this conclusion after I finished screaming abuse at the microwave for beeping before I could hit the off switch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6680) - you deserved it (20943)
On 02/12/2012 at 4:50pm - misc - by fuck teh poleese (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, my boyfriend sang "happy birthday" to my vagina. It was my birthday last month and he forgot, but he remembered the date of the first time he went down on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24155) - you deserved it (3608)
On 02/19/2012 at 6:37am - intimacy - by me - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was called an 'unhelpful little bitch' by a customer, after I informed her that we couldn't order a pair of shoes she wanted from the company in her size because it's a discontinued model. This little tirade continued for another few minutes, with her insulting me and my intelligence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17437) - you deserved it (1461)
On 02/06/2012 at 11:27pm - work - by Unhelpful (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I discovered that during fire drills, my school lines everyone up next to some extremely flammable and explosive propane tanks. If we ever have a real fire, we will all die. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22695) - you deserved it (1618)
On 02/25/2012 at 11:18pm - misc - by afraidtoburn (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my wife screamed at me, calling me a "useless, ungrateful piece of crap", all because I wouldn't have sex with her, despite hours of her nagging. I said no because I've been laid-up in bed for the past week waiting on surgery for an excruciatingly painful hernia. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26761) - you deserved it (2441)
On 02/03/2012 at 8:17pm - intimacy - by B (man) - United States
Today, a first date with a guy went so badly that he actually paid me to never call him again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21343) - you deserved it (3439)
On 02/22/2012 at 4:37am - love - by Lonely Gay (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, the man of my dreams kissed me. It was everything I had imagined it would be until in the middle of the kiss, he burped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21800) - you deserved it (2416)
On 02/04/2012 at 9:52am - love - by ac-hoo (woman) - India (Delhi)
Monday 17 June 2013
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