Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I have never read any of the Harry Potter books. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25097) - you deserved it (40510)
On 01/12/2012 at 12:36am - love - by Nate (man) - United States
Today, I got a Facebook message from the school genius/nerd, who I have never talked to. He politely informed me that after much thought and deliberation, he has narrowed it down to who his ideal mate is. Me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24317) - you deserved it (5980)
On 01/15/2012 at 10:30pm - love - by geeklove - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I couldn't contain my laughter when a patient told me she'd named her unborn daughter Twinkie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25143) - you deserved it (3569)
On 01/06/2012 at 5:49pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was cooking with super hot ghost peppers. The package said "After handling them not to touch your eyes, nose or pets". They should've added "penis" to that list. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9824) - you deserved it (48630)
On 01/06/2012 at 9:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I met my son for the first time since I had to put him up for adoption over two decades ago. I wanted to make amends and get to know him. Instead, all I got to know was how well he can throw a punch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16162) - you deserved it (37934)
On 01/13/2012 at 8:38pm - kids - by me (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was driving back home with my family. I had to sit quietly for half an hour, all while pretending I didn't notice my sister playing with herself under the coat on her lap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34244) - you deserved it (2508)
On 01/23/2012 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by jjs51 (man) - United States
Today, I switched from pads to tampons. It took me several botched attempts trying insert one before I succeeded, and now I feel like I've just raped myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28513) - you deserved it (10415)
On 01/15/2012 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by lolwut - United States
Today, I received a late Christmas present from my estranged father. I was really excited, having neither seen nor heard from him in nearly two years. It was a $200 gift card for a store that only exists in Canada. I don't live in Canada. Not even close. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21012) - you deserved it (2673)
On 01/01/2012 at 3:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, like every other day, my boss referred to my breasts as pillows he needs to nap on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26263) - you deserved it (3271)
On 01/20/2012 at 6:56am - intimacy - by Emily27 (woman) - United Kingdom (East Lothian)
Today, I moved in with my new roommate. She's a vegetarian, and won't let me put my meat in the fridge because it will "contaminate her food". FML
I agree, your life sucks (23766) - you deserved it (4172)
On 01/07/2012 at 6:11am - misc - by merrymary - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, my wife posted on Facebook, "FUCK THA POLICE!" She got 40 likes. I'm a police officer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33575) - you deserved it (7587)
On 01/16/2012 at 10:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my mother threatened me if I keep wearing yoga pants to school, she's going to have my dad pick me up in a speedo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10854) - you deserved it (31299)
On 01/11/2012 at 7:49pm - misc - by ThatOneGirl646 - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was left at the altar. For the second time. By the same man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26556) - you deserved it (42229)
On 01/30/2012 at 12:37am - love - by givingup (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Friday 24 May 2013
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