Miscellaneous: What am I doing? - FML

What am I doing?

By forever young - 05/07/2013 15:16 - United States

Today, I Googled "How to act like an adult." I'm 37. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 413

You deserved it 52 820

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Same thing different taste

By badgirl - 21/06/2011 21:41 - United States

Today, I Googled myself. I found my mugshot and a blog my mom had written about how much of a problem child I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 340

You deserved it 23 616

By hiii. - 16/03/2010 02:27 - United States

Today, I was so bored I googled the word "bored." The results were boring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 336

You deserved it 40 882

By 14YearOld - 25/11/2011 17:17 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out my parents have a list of everything I have ever Googled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 891

You deserved it 7 996

Indoctrinated

By workfordayzz - 14/05/2014 17:45 - United States

Today, I realized that because of my construction job, I have spent such a huge amount of time with older, cynical guys that I keep uncontrollably using the phrase "fucking kids these days" regularly like an idiot. I'm 18. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 306

You deserved it 8 958

Need help

By Nohelpforyou - 04/03/2022 12:00 - Canada - London

Today, I was so depressed that I almost called Kids Help Phone for support. Then I remembered that I’m 33. FML

I agree, your life sucks 727

You deserved it 132

Lizard queen

By Anonymous - 05/07/2023 06:00

Today, someone tried to guess my age. They guessed 45, then 39. I'm 35 and just spent $20,000 on plastic surgery to make myself look more youthful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 1 732

We've all been there

By b…… - 28/09/2023 22:00

Today, I looked through my daughter’s search history. Did I find porn? No, worse. At the age of 17, she has been looking up the definitions of commonly used words such as ‘arbitrary,’ ‘pretentious,’ and ‘initiative.’ FML

I agree, your life sucks 144

You deserved it 1 125

By missyoudad. - 31/08/2010 07:54 - Australia

Today, I Googled my father, who I haven't seen in 3 years. The first website link was his obituary. When I confronted my mom about it, she said, "Oh, didn't I tell you?" and walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 513

You deserved it 2 861

By anonymous - 05/04/2012 21:53 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I realized my Internet addiction had gone too far when I tried to Google what was in my freezer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 665

You deserved it 28 881

Fate, up against your will

By Gerry - 03/01/2021 17:03

Today, according to my wife of 30 years, I'm finally old enough that I look, smell, sound and act like my father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 749

You deserved it 111

Next

Top comments

Kheasus 8

Friday 5 July 2013 19:35

@35 You have the grammar of a child as well...

DocBastard 38

Friday 5 July 2013 18:56

You're only as young as you feel. You clearly feel 13. Go look in the mirror at your gray hairs and newly-forming wrinkles. That'll smack you back to reality awfully quickly.

Comments

iDumpo 7

Sunday 7 July 2013 19:39

Who says when you grow older you must become more mature? Be yourself, OP!

baref00tmama 15

Monday 8 July 2013 4:51

Most modern-day societies say something along those lines. At some point, a person needs to take on a certain amount of responsibility.

interesting33 36

Monday 8 July 2013 1:10

At least you didn't Yahooligan it :P

underguarded 20

Monday 8 July 2013 6:13

Maybe get off FML to start

Baybiiie 11

Monday 8 July 2013 23:30

Maybe your mind only grew to 12 years old and no more lmfao

Brandon_NW 9

Saturday 13 July 2013 3:29

Cool story bro. Changed my life.

TcheQ 12

Thursday 18 July 2013 9:57

I don't think i'll bother googling that. Why the hell would I want to act like an old person who's given up on life?

TheOtherNewest1 6

Tuesday 13 August 2013 4:12

"There's no point in being grown-up if you can't act a little childish sometimes." - Tom Baker as the Fourth incarnation of The Doctor.

The_9th_Doctor 18

Wednesday 2 October 2013 3:44

yeah, you grow the hell up.

Pique_fml 8

Friday 13 December 2013 21:56

you suck

quinn1184 25

Wednesday 16 April 2014 15:24

Could have watched Spongebob.

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on. At one point, he started to kiss my ear. Then, he stopped, went into the bathroom, and came out with about four Q-tips. He then said to me, "Just take care of your ears, then I'll continue." FML

I agree, your life sucks 860

You deserved it 2 006

Today, I left my job, fulfilling my one month's notice after receiving a job offer from a much better-paying role. After saying goodbye to everyone, I left the building. Not two minutes later, the company who was offering the new job called to say they'd changed their minds, and there was now no longer a job on offer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 625

You deserved it 136

The Top

Today, on the airplane, the kid behind me kicked my seat hundreds of times, while the big bald guy next to me farted deadly ones repeatedly. I was on a non-stop 14-hour flight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 996

You deserved it 2 611

Today, I was getting ready for the school swimming carnival and was running very late. I reached for my deodorant and sprayed it on. It was only when I was at the pool that I realized I had accidentally grabbed the spray tan and covered my underarms in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 480

You deserved it 28 072

Today, while talking with my ex, I mentioned I was depressed about turning 40. He said he'd been depressed about turning 40 as well, until he started screwing hot 20-somethings. We were still together when he turned 40. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 126

You deserved it 4 449

Today, I was holding my son and smelled poop so I checked his diaper, but there was nothing there. Then I realized it was my breath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 112

You deserved it 40 560

Today, I discovered that alcohol makes me red-faced, extremely gassy and eager to discuss my virginity with everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 248

You deserved it 2 426

Today, like every other day, my roommate's alarm began to go off at 7:30am. What time does she have to wake up? 10:00am. Why does she have her alarm go off for two and a half hours? Because last semester she needed it to go off then and she is too lazy to change it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 328

You deserved it 1 094