Intimacy: Today, while I was shopping, I saw my old friend from high school....

By snownerd - 03/11/2011 16:13 - United States

Today, while I was shopping, I saw my old friend from high school. After a bit of talking, I ended up giving her my phone number. I wrote it on an old receipt. Little did I remember, the receipt was from when I bought lube and condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 761

You deserved it 39 702

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Same thing different taste

Memory loss

By UGH - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to return a shirt to Target. My mom offered to do it for me on her way to work, so I gave her the shirt and receipt. Later, I remembered that on the same receipt I had purchased condoms, lube, and whipped cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 275

You deserved it 81 065

By mrdave - 04/07/2009 05:54 - Canada

Today, I looked in my pocket for the phone number of a girl I met last night at a party. I remembered us talking and exchanging phone numbers. When I found the piece of paper, I discovered that instead of writing her number down, I had drunkenly written down my own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 904

You deserved it 46 459

By hihipanda - 30/08/2009 12:58 - Singapore

Today, my friend and I went to a bar for drinks. I noticed this cute girl and went over to say "Hi." I had a great conversation with her and I asked for her number before she left. She passed it to me on a piece of paper with instructions specifying for my friend to call her and not me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 515

You deserved it 3 329

By totallyembarassed - 07/07/2012 04:08 - United States - Charlotte

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 993

You deserved it 28 758

By tammy - 27/06/2012 05:05 - United States - Inglewood

Today, while cashiering at the drug store, I saw my ex-boyfriend, who I'm still completely in love with. Being the only cashier, I had to ring him up. He was buying condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 125

You deserved it 3 616

By Anonymous - 16/09/2012 13:46 - United States

Today, I was finally paid back by a friend who wrote a check out. Not really looking at it, I went to the bank to deposit it. As I handed it to the teller, I noticed that he had written "sex" in the "for" memo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 555

You deserved it 4 111

By Noname - 16/02/2009 06:41 - United States

Today, I took a friend out for what I thought was date. After dinner was over and I paid, she pulled the bill out and wrote her name phone number on it for the waiter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 392

You deserved it 3 650

Fat chance

By Dave - 23/04/2012 13:22 - United States - Brookfield

Today, I left my number on my receipt for a cute waitress. As I was leaving the bar, she came running out and called me over. I obviously got excited. Turns out I'd forgotten to sign my slip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 654

You deserved it 22 023

By pimpdaddyX - 22/09/2012 16:22 - Malaysia - Shah Alam

Today, trying to be smooth, I slipped the girl I like a piece of paper with my phone number written on it. A while later, she slipped it back to me and left the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 171

You deserved it 19 943

By yournick - 31/01/2011 21:23 - Canada

Today, at my job as a cashier, a very old man came through my checkout. His purchase consisted of a box of condoms and a can of whipped cream. The creepy smile he gave me has scarred me for life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 243

You deserved it 4 831

iFizzgig 11

Thursday 3 November 2011 22:50

You were dropping a hint.

ohmandapants 16

Thursday 3 November 2011 22:51

Well now they know you're getting laid.

Comments

bccaper 3

Friday 4 November 2011 7:37

Don't have cell phones where ur from?

badactor009 0

Friday 4 November 2011 8:02

YDI. Most of us that are past high school carry this thing called a cell phone. It has many functions that keep us guys from having to use our lube and condom receipts as make shift post-it notes. Even without a cell phone, you need to be situationally aware and not do stupid shit like that.

underguarded 20

Friday 4 November 2011 8:16

Maybe she won't look at what you bought? Otherwise she may think your really lonely

Ugi 26

Friday 4 November 2011 13:45

Don't follow the lonely bit - lube you might use alone but condoms you tend to use with a friend.

purdles31 0

Friday 4 November 2011 8:44

This us what passes as an fml today? My god this is shit

thir13enthour 0

Friday 4 November 2011 13:12

Trying to find the problem here...

Ugi 26

Friday 4 November 2011 13:43

Don't you just _hate_ it when that happens!

brooks10101 1

Friday 4 November 2011 16:27

Lol thats ****** awsome id be prowd of that one

joaxim 4

Friday 4 November 2011 17:38

In loads of places condoms just come up as "chemist goods" on the receipt, in the UK at least, so that can be almost anything, as lots of (embarrassing) things can show up as the same.