Intimacy: Today, trying to take initiative, I wore nothing but an apron...

By Sorry - 03/03/2010 16:22 - Canada

Today, trying to take initiative, I wore nothing but an apron and led my husband to the kitchen by his knob to have some fun. I tripped on the floor and used his knob to keep balance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 832

You deserved it 7 824

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 01/08/2013 22:29 - Mexico - Mexico

Today, I tried to give my husband a striptease for his birthday. I wound up tripping over my own panties and nearly dislocating my shoulder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 014

You deserved it 9 303

A for Effort

By Anonymous - 07/01/2021 20:01 - Australia

Today, I thought I would spice things up a bit and rocked my man's world, but in the kitchen. Apparently, some of his cum must have got on the tiles because I slipped on it 15 minutes later. In doing so I smacked my head on the fridge.. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 190

You deserved it 666

By Gordon - 22/07/2009 14:12 - United States

Today, I was standing by the bed naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opens the door and walks over to me, swinging her hips, wearing pratically nothing. About four feet from me, she trips on the edge of the floor mat, and uses my 'junk' to catch herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 690

You deserved it 6 760

By Anonymous - 03/04/2011 15:14 - United States

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 727

You deserved it 6 417

Classic Dave

By Sarahir - 29/04/2020 05:00

Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating into the kitchen sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 188

You deserved it 391

By Anonymous - 20/09/2010 14:58 - United Kingdom

Today, I walked in on my dad touching his knob, in the kitchen, while cooking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 319

You deserved it 4 000

By Anonymous - 27/02/2016 07:27 - Japan - Ageo

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband, and I tried to do a swift position-change like they do in the movies. I wound up flipping off the bed and busting my nose open on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 779

You deserved it 5 478

By sissica - 11/02/2009 23:52 - United States

Today, when my husband got home from work, I was standing in the kitchen, wearing nothing but stilletos. He asked me to make him hot chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 183

You deserved it 6 623

By Anonymous - 01/10/2010 05:43 - Canada

Today, in an attempt to spice up our relationship, I tied my boyfriend up and did a striptease for him. I pulled my skirt down over my heels but tripped as I tried to step out of it. Not only did I pull a muscle in my leg but I elbowed him in the groin. So much for spice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 721

You deserved it 9 185

Busted

By Anonymous - 27/05/2016 19:09 - United States - Lady Lake

Today, my husband was being obnoxious, so I jokingly sprayed him with the dish hose. The floor got wet, and he slipped and busted his knees. Our daughter rushed over to him to see if he was OK, then slipped and busted her head on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 798

You deserved it 7 227

snapdragons 0

Wednesday 3 March 2010 20:05

**** his life actually

Pixie333 6

Wednesday 3 March 2010 20:04

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Comments

trackrunner00008 0

Friday 5 March 2010 2:41

@ myman47 I don't have a knob. It's too big to be any kind of knob.

epeets 1

Friday 5 March 2010 2:47

that would KILL the mood but it would've made a great home video for your personal collection. lol

niesenator 0

Friday 5 March 2010 4:21

Apparently no one on this site reads. I've heard the term "knob" countless times in books and movies. But most of the time the character who said it is British.

s_landholm 0

Friday 5 March 2010 5:55

to DGross: your hot.

krisgonewild 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 8:48

haha WTF is your husband a door lol hopefully you guys still did it no one wants to be **** blocked by his floor he would probably tear it up haha. oh yea and that guy with a pic of two girls holding their **** we know ur fake go do something with ur life

Howdyplz 2

Sunday 7 March 2010 21:39

Owww, F His Life. I think you lost me when you said you led him into the kitchen by his knob. I find that more WTF-inducing ridiculous than sexy. I guess if he likes that, go for it. But tripping and pulling on it? I'm a girl and I cringed reading that. Ow.