Love: Today, I went to the beach with my boyfriend and family. My sister...

By Anonymous - 01/07/2012 04:22

Today, I went to the beach with my boyfriend and family. My sister coyly pointed out the scratch marks down his back, hoping to embarrass me in front of my parents. The marks weren't from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 159

You deserved it 2 368

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Same thing different taste

I have sex

By Anonymous - 05/08/2013 17:58 - United States - Athens

Today, I wore a bikini to the lake with my parents. I didn't know that my back was covered in bruises, and ended up having to awkwardly explain to my parents that I am not in an abusive relationship; the bruises came from the sex I had last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 520

You deserved it 16 276

Life's a beach

By Brittanyy_leigh - 17/12/2009 07:57 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 143

You deserved it 6 014

By Anonymous - 26/06/2012 22:04 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 393

You deserved it 2 295

By Crashburn - 16/01/2012 11:09 - United Kingdom

Today, after having a naked wrestle with my boyfriend, I discovered he'd left a skidmark on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 863

You deserved it 15 389

By Burned - 05/06/2011 00:54 - United States

Today, I went to the beach with my friends to show off my engagement ring. I fell asleep in the sun and woke up extremely sunburnt to a text from my boyfriend confessing that he's been cheating on me. I gave him the ring back. Now I have its tan line on my finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 099

You deserved it 7 078

Brutally honest

By Anonymous - 12/09/2009 07:25 - Australia

Today, at dinner with my boyfriend and my family, my mother had too much to drink and asked my boyfriend how I was in bed with the purpose of embarrassing me. His reply? "Not as good as her sister." His defense? "It was only one time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 933

You deserved it 2 915

By ilovedirt - 10/07/2011 03:12 - United States

Today, I was tanning by the pool. My friend put his arms under my back and knees and picked me up. He threw me across the kiddy pool to my boyfriend, shouting "Catch!" My boyfriend didn't catch me. Instead of a tan, I have a huge bruise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 318

You deserved it 3 764

By megaladon - 28/06/2010 08:12 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around. When he slipped his hand down my pants, he scratched my pubic hair and said "scruffy, scruffy, scruffy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 865

You deserved it 37 442

It's not what you think

By tessykins - 22/10/2009 07:41 - United States

Today, this guy who likes me accused me of cutting myself. I asked him what he was talking about, and he said, "Don't lie, I saw those scars on your thighs when we went swimming." I have stretch marks on my inner thighs, and now I have to explain them to him so he doesn't think I cut myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 368

You deserved it 3 299

By metalmusic - 05/07/2010 05:37 - United States

Today, my boyfriend went to the beach. His parents relentlessly tried to hook him with other girls, all the while knowing that we're dating. Their reasoning is that I'm not a 'real girlfriend.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 905

You deserved it 4 400

JFurr 9

Sunday 1 July 2012 12:18

He's just nervous in his own skin around your parents. So he tried taking it off.

SovietBarney 8

Sunday 1 July 2012 12:24

He must have been attacked by one of those vicious cougars, if you catch my drift.

Comments

LuckyLynx7732 5

Monday 2 July 2012 3:09

Perhaps you gave them to him and didn't know it at the moment. That happened with my girlfriend and I. We were both like "what the hell?"

SoultheWolf 19

Monday 2 July 2012 3:10

People need to understand something, there is a MAJOR difference from sex scratches down the back, someone who scratches your back (or himself) cause it itches, and cat scratches. Sex scratches will always be straight down and usually around the same area. If you're itchy the scratches wont be very visible, it will be more like a large red area because your'e stratching all over the place to get the itch. As for cat scratches, seriously? Have you people ever been scratched by a cat? They look NOTHING like fingernail scratches. The wound forms/heals differently and they are going to be very close together, not spread out like a human's hand. They will also be in several places (if the cat is mad and attacking him) and if it was an accidental scratch (like he's pickign it up and it claws into him to not fall) it will be in a small area, usually in the shoulder. I know this from experince since. I've had a cat shred my back before because my friend scared him and I was tryign to get him out of the room, it was almost as if I took a razor to my back and sliced it up, same thing happened to my left wrist too. It's not hard to distinguish the difference... I hope OP can and if he is cheating on her dump his sorry ass.

howrudoin 11

Monday 2 July 2012 4:29

Bahk scrachaa! Bahk scrachaa! Bahk scracha? Bahk scracha? (peter's voice)

bwzwally8 15

Monday 2 July 2012 11:31

What the hell does coyly mean?

Bacontree 14

Tuesday 3 July 2012 17:38

You decided to ask it here rather than google it, because...? "coy/koi/ Adjective: (esp. of a woman) 1. Making a pretense of shyness or modesty that is intended to be alluring but is often regarded as irritating."

LadyJoker21 0

Monday 2 July 2012 18:35

DAMN

shanskiness 2

Monday 2 July 2012 20:32

Its probably not even what you thought it was

CarouselHeart 11

Tuesday 3 July 2012 18:37

Both your sister and your boyfriend sound like jerks.

eatsleepjb 8

Tuesday 3 July 2012 20:47

Don't jump to the conclusion that he's cheating on you. It could be from some sort if animal like his dog that jumped on him, or it could be from a previous girlfriend that he had before you. Also it could be from some sort of massage. You never know.

xNephilim 18

Tuesday 2 October 2012 8:23

What? A previous girlfriend? From when, last night?

Dravite 9

Wednesday 4 July 2012 18:58

I guess you could say that.. your relationship? it got scratched.

dakelly_t 2

Thursday 5 July 2012 5:05

It could have easily been something much worse. Sucks your sister is trying to start things,,,, but you must be smart enough to analyze sex scratches vs non sex ones.