Miscellaneous: Today, I was walking to the parking lot from class while texting....

By mynameis - 13/11/2009 06:35 - United States

Today, I was walking to the parking lot from class while texting. When I looked up as I approached my parking spot, I noticed the words "F*ck you Dave" keyed into my car. Hi, my name is Clare. Who's Dave? FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 459

You deserved it 2 252

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Same thing different taste

Troll level 3000

By really?! - 22/03/2020 06:30

Today, I found my car with its front end smashed in. The offender was nowhere to be seen, but had left a helpful note that stated, "Sorry about your car but you can go fuck yourself because you will never find me. Muwahahaha!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 907

You deserved it 143

Overreaction

By anonymous - 02/06/2013 05:20 - United States - Yorktown Heights

Today, I accidentally hit someone's car while in the supermarket car park. I left a note, went shopping, and when I came back my windows were shattered, my tires were slashed, and "FUCK YOU" was written on my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 709

You deserved it 15 860

By mickstinator - 25/06/2009 15:37 - United States

Today, I was parking my car outside of my apartment, but the big truck next to the spot went over the line. I squeezed in anyway. Later, I discovered the truck had left and someone keyed my car. They left a note saying, "Good parking job, asshole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 267

You deserved it 7 230

By Anonymous - 03/01/2015 21:16 - United States - Newark

Today, as I left the supermarket, I found someone had hit my car in the parking lot. There was a note tucked under the wipers. Insurance details? Nope. It just said "Sorry dude. I fucked up. Good luck with the car." Great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 075

You deserved it 2 279

By jason - 24/04/2009 13:24 - United States

Today, I came home to find a car parked in my assigned space. Pissed off, I left a note on the car's windshield saying, "Hey Assface, thanks for parking in my spot. I spat on your door handle." It turns out it was my girlfriend's parent's car. They took us out to dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 277

You deserved it 76 704

By Dansonn - 17/03/2009 03:17 - United States

Today, after work I went to the parking lot to my car to go home. I found my car doors heavily scratched and all my tires cut, with a note on my windshield. The note read, "F*** you, Jackson." I'm Tyler. Jackson is my co-worker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200 775

You deserved it 10 618

By hannibal - 02/11/2010 13:44 - Australia

Today, I heard a loud-speaker announcement in my college that someone had left their car in the car park, still running, with keys in the ignition. I laughed at that person's foolishness until I realised it was mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 846

You deserved it 37 416

By apparentlyunattractive - 07/06/2009 09:23 - United States

Today, someone left a note on my car, saying "You're gorgeous. Call me. #######." I called the number and they said they saw me in the store I was in, telling me "You were the ONLY attractive person in there." We decided to meet up. He walks over, I say hi, he says "I think I put my number on the wrong car." FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 042

You deserved it 7 444

By Chops - 09/03/2009 06:35 - United States

Today, I was walking from my office to the place i had parked my car, a distance of approximately three blocks. As I was about to round the last corner I was forced to dive out of the way of a speeding car. As I looked up, I noticed that it was my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 99 807

You deserved it 4 419

By Anonymous - 01/12/2015 09:49 - Australia - Corrimal

Today, I couldn't see my car in a crowded car park. I pressed unlock on my keys and saw the lights flash. As I walked over I also saw someone run from my car with an armful of my stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 708

You deserved it 6 603

spayellow 0

Friday 13 November 2009 16:40

Ummm... I think it's pretty obvious that "d-a-v-e" is "clare" written very poorly. You can't expect perfect penmanship with a key, can you?

8trickster8 0

Friday 13 November 2009 16:24

There's a lot of these "wrong name keyed into my car" FML's. Maybe it's just the same guy for each one? Hmmm, I think I'm on to something.

Comments

fawfulster 11

Saturday 14 November 2009 1:35

I guess there's cammeras to solve your problem... FYL

iBou_fml 4

Saturday 14 November 2009 2:15

hahahha, added to fav.

blastvortex 3

Saturday 14 November 2009 9:57

You should've added a comma to make it grammatically correct. :)

mc_pickles 0

Sunday 15 November 2009 11:01

:D my name is clare too! :D

fotc77 0

Sunday 15 November 2009 22:03

this is happening a lot on fml

bear1414 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 5:00

My name is Clare too!!! I'm sorry bout your car, that really sux..... but the fact there is no "i" in your name made my day!! you too #71

RedInThaHead 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 7:44

lol hahahah

Bcfrmkc816 17

Saturday 18 June 2011 13:19

saves not here man.

yaaypenguinss 1

Tuesday 9 August 2011 10:37

damn that suckss

hiddenpoet 0

Monday 6 February 2012 3:26

DAVE'S NOT HERE MAN

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I agree, your life sucks 497

You deserved it 92

Today, our company got hacked. Our secretary fell for someone badly impersonating the head of customer service and sent them a full list of employee information from one of our new clients. The boss wants to blame us in IT for not training her on how to avoid this. He fell for a phishing attack last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 485

You deserved it 76

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Today, my friend showed me a creepy piece of artwork he'd drawn. I laughed and said that it would give me nightmares, meaning it as a compliment. Turns out, this one was in honor of his dead grandmother, who'd raised him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 747

You deserved it 10 438

Today, my crazy psychopath of a neighbor sent me an email with the subject, "So, about your sex life." I've been sitting here for 20 minutes staring at it because I'm too scared to open it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 863

You deserved it 3 955

Today, and recently, I've had a crush on a woman, we've and texting for a while. She always replies instantly and very positively, but she never asks about me or initiates anything. I have no idea whether I have a chance, but probably not. There are very limited signs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 492

Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 686

You deserved it 3 149

Today, on a girls night out at a very fancy restaurant, our waiter spilled my chocolate dessert over my new white pants. To repay up, they gave us a free bottle of red wine, which he promptly coated me in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 960

You deserved it 1 702

Today, I spent 6 hours on an airplane next to an alcoholic Pink Floyd fanatic. I must've drifted off because when I took a trip to the bathroom I noticed that my pant leg that had been closest to the drunk man was soaking wet. I returned to my seat. He was on his side, facing me. I smelt the wet spot. Not beer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 268

You deserved it 2 010

Same thing different taste

Troll level 3000

Overreaction

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