Sex, Awkward, Cheating and Intimacy: Sorry, what?

Sorry, what?

By butch - 13/11/2009 07:04 - United States

Today, my upstairs neighbor congratulated me on keeping him up 'til dawn with my girlfriend and the chick in the apartment next to us. He doesn't know how I got them to agree to a threesome. Since I was at my folks all weekend, neither do I. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 124

You deserved it 2 408

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

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Same thing different taste

By pear8head - 08/08/2009 16:31 - United States

Today, I ran into my new apartment neighbor. She said she could hear me and my girlfriend having wild sex last night. She told me she had always wanted to have a threesome. My new neighbor is as old as my grandma, and even resembles her. I politely declined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 289

You deserved it 5 906

By emkatch - 21/07/2009 19:47 - Canada

Today, I came home about two hours early from a friend's party. After I walked in and upstairs, I quickly and quietly left and went back to the party. I guess my parents decided to have a little party as well. It's called a threesome with my neighbor. They still don't know that I know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 817

You deserved it 4 368

By TooLoud - 31/05/2015 00:12 - United States - Moorpark

Today, I got a text from my neighbor complaining about my girlfriend and me being too noisy in bed. I'm at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 085

You deserved it 2 996

Classic

By ouch - 09/08/2009 01:56 - Brazil

Today, while entering the building I live in, I walked into my neighbor who winked at me and said last night must have been great. After I asked why, he said he could hear my girlfriend moaning and screaming, and that I must be pretty good at it. I was just coming back from a week overseas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 335

You deserved it 3 416

Caught in 4K

By Anonymous - 22/03/2009 13:04 - Malta

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 623

You deserved it 34 712

By no more mr nice guy - 27/12/2016 07:32

Today, my friend invited me, his girlfriend, and the girl I like over to his house to hang out. We hoped it would get me closer to my crush. The day ended with them having a threesome and me locked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 994

You deserved it 955

Get Lucky, sound of the summer

By ashamed - 25/11/2015 15:50 - United States - Buffalo

Today, my neighbor called me a lucky bastard and said he heard me getting my wife off last night. I was too ashamed to admit the sounds he was referring to were from my 17-year-old daughter after a wasp flew through her bedroom window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 208

You deserved it 2 407

By holler - 15/09/2011 04:22 - Japan

Today, I had my parents over at my new apartment. As I was telling them how quiet and peaceful my new place is, we could hear my neighbors talking nasty to each other before launching into a full-blown sex ordeal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 158

You deserved it 3 152

By Anonymous - 16/03/2013 06:19 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend, when my upstairs neighbor decided to take the longest piss known to man. He moaned the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 667

You deserved it 4 832

By AirOne - 12/11/2008 14:39 - United States

Today, right after sex, my girlfriend apologized to the neighbor for the screaming. He thanked her for the entertainment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 661

You deserved it 10 818

perdix 29

Friday 13 November 2009 17:17

They agreed because you invited them both over to play "Rock, Paper, Scissors" and threw away the rock and the paper.

boog_fml 7

Saturday 14 November 2009 0:00

Either I'm drunk or this FML really sucks because I didn't understand a word of it =

Comments

Reutan 0

Friday 13 November 2009 16:26

That's terrible... fyl. Hmm...did I actually make it this early?

crabbyabby718 0

Wednesday 31 August 2011 4:57

1, you just ruined the first comment.

Krilov 0

Friday 13 November 2009 16:40

rofl fyl

tayzer_fml 0

Friday 13 November 2009 16:52

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

falling4youxo 7

Monday 29 August 2011 12:44

This is FML, not grammar school.

Ninjasaurus18 9

Sunday 29 April 2012 22:59

Yes it is. I'm a grammar Nazi. I didn't get it either until I re-read it slowly four times.

enough4 0

Friday 13 November 2009 17:08

And the guy in the upstairs apartment knows it was the girl in the apartment next door how, exactly?

xslapchopx 0

Thursday 29 July 2010 5:39

uhhhh good point.

brandon2014 0

Sunday 15 August 2010 1:20

they are in the same apartment complex, doesn't mean you can't know someone from a floor below.

agsilver 14

Saturday 23 April 2011 15:33

it's all in the cries man. men go UGHGHHHHH. women go Oh yeah or it feels so good, etc

perdix 29

Friday 13 November 2009 17:17

They agreed because you invited them both over to play "Rock, Paper, Scissors" and threw away the rock and the paper.

gatorcheer 0

Friday 13 November 2009 17:52

Agree with #3.

bugmenotmofo 34

Friday 13 November 2009 18:18

you've been replaced by a plastic penis.

Erindub 0

Friday 13 November 2009 20:06

Damn that sucks. Sorry dude

boog_fml 7

Saturday 14 November 2009 0:00

Either I'm drunk or this FML really sucks because I didn't understand a word of it =

lil_ham1644 29

Monday 15 September 2014 23:40

Op was out of town & his gf, the woman next door, & possibly another dude had sex in his (or their) apartment.

CallMeHush 0

Saturday 14 November 2009 0:39

Don't just hate when you come home to find out you just missed another threesome? You better talk to her and tell her the next time you want to be the meat in that sandwich. ( LOL threesome is in my phone's predictive text)