Miscellaneous: Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk.... - FML

By ironic driver - 04/09/2011 22:10 - United States

Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 559

You deserved it 4 608

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/03/2012 07:33 - United States

Today, I got pulled over for drunk driving. This is the second time its happened. I was completely sober both times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 417

You deserved it 16 508

By Anonymous - 25/08/2011 06:49 - United States

Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 134

You deserved it 3 486

By Anonymous - 18/05/2009 06:45 - Canada

Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 986

You deserved it 23 997

By drewig - 10/05/2010 05:28 - United States

Today, I was driving home from work when I was pulled over by a cop. She asked why I was being pulled over and figuring she knew I said, "For swerving because of my alcohol problem." I had a broken tail light. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 149

You deserved it 53 571

No good deed…

By SCdriver - 16/07/2012 06:04 - United States - Lexington

Today, I called the cops to let them know that a drunk man was driving dangerously down my road. About an hour later, I was going to the store and got pulled over for speeding by the cop I called. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 233

You deserved it 36 233

By DWIcop - 03/04/2019 00:00

Today, while leaving our county courthouse after testifying as the arresting officer in multiple DWI cases, I hit a wrong way sign in the court’s parking lot. All the defense attorneys were outside, asking me if I was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 764

You deserved it 814

By notdrivinganytimesoon - 04/03/2015 02:35 - United States - Richardson

Today, I got pulled over during my driving test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 259

You deserved it 7 688

By Jesse - 20/03/2009 05:48 - United States

Today, I was pulled over by my father who is a police officer. He was training a rookie and gave me a breathalyzer test to show his trainee how to do it. I blew a .15 and was taken to jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 942

You deserved it 151 266

By airborne - 06/05/2009 01:11 - United States

Today, I saw someone drive recklessly as if they were drunk. When I called the cops, I got pulled over by another cop for talking on my cell phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 159

You deserved it 17 606

By driverman12 - 04/04/2009 19:42 - United States

Today, I was driving on the freeway when I saw a car in front of me swerving across 3 lanes of traffic. Thinking he might be drunk, I dialed 911 on my phone, but I dropped it. I fished under my seat to get it, swerving, and got pulled over by highway patrol and given a field sobriety test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 173

You deserved it 30 988

Next

Top comments

marinus_fml 19

Monday 5 September 2011 8:50

I think you were drunk...calling it DWI??

StoryOfTheYear 14

Monday 5 September 2011 8:51

Maybe the line "I swear to drunk officer, I'm not God!" will actually work in this situation.

Comments

sildavin 0

Monday 5 September 2011 17:48

I smell an obvious fake.

corrinaswan 0

Monday 5 September 2011 17:49

Your drunk you put DWI its DUI smart one

smart_stupid 4

Monday 5 September 2011 18:06

Driving While Intoxicating :P

that1_navy_dude 3

Monday 5 September 2011 18:29

DUI is a lesser charge than a DWI in some states.

L3g4lPl4typus 0

Monday 5 September 2011 18:10

that, my friend, is what we call hyper irony

SadinSherman 16

Monday 5 September 2011 18:22

You could probably report him or her

ggdawg24 0

Monday 5 September 2011 18:32

Lol. Oh the irony

mdub2011 0

Monday 5 September 2011 18:38

DUI!

no_namer386 5

Monday 5 September 2011 18:41

DOA, DUI, DWI, ADD, WTH?? Why they don't just call it Alcoholized Driving?

jdawg2010 0

Monday 5 September 2011 18:44

DWI? W.T.F?

vbmg152 18

Monday 5 September 2011 18:48

Driving while intoxicated it's the old term for DUI! They changed it to DUI ( driving under the influence to cover drugs & alcohol!) when drugs got so rampant!

vbmg152 18

Monday 5 September 2011 18:46

Way back when, it was DWI or driving while intoxicated! Now, it's DUI, driving under the influence because that covers alcohol & drugs! BTW, I think OP is lying!

Zambaku 9

Monday 5 September 2011 20:21

Are you an idiot? Maybe OP forgot it was DUI. You know, some people aren't stupid little 10-year-olds.

xGolBLiiN 1

Monday 5 September 2011 19:02

don't remind him to read you your rights get out of it and get him arrested

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The Top

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 681

You deserved it 7 123

Today, I was working at the pharmacy and had a older man come in. He was buying Viagra and, by law, we are required to ask if the patient had any questions. His lovely response was, "When you coming over so I can test this stuff out?" His wife and daughter thought it was hilarious. I could've died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 845

You deserved it 635

The Top

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I was sad, but the only thing my mom could say was, "You should have waited until I got him to mow the lawn." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 870

You deserved it 6 284

Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 434

You deserved it 7 721

Today, my workplace had a big employee photoshoot for an ad campaign. I was there all of 30 seconds before the photographer said, "What the fuck? Look guys, this ain't an ad for facial abortions." He then asked me and another colleague to step out of the shot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 559

You deserved it 3 816

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really hit it off with. Then he admitted that he was a recovering heroin addict and had to cut our date short to go to the methadone clinic. When I got home, I realized that my wallet was missing $40. I think he lied about the "recovering" part. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 874

You deserved it 4 989

Today, I got a new computer because my old one crashed, deleting all music, photos, and documents. I still had all my music on my iPod though, and went to sync it to the new computer. By accident, my younger brother pulled the cord out before it was done, deleting all 3,000 songs forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 077

You deserved it 7 084

Today, I told my mother-in-law that I was going through postpartum depression and was put on a antidepressant to help. Her response was, "Great, now we have a pill head in the family." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 076

You deserved it 109