Health: Today, I was in the elevator with my boss, when I let rip the...

By Anonymous - 05/06/2011 20:45 - United States

Today, I was in the elevator with my boss, when I let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 406

You deserved it 46 339

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Same thing different taste

The sweet smell of success

By NoPromotionForYou - 07/05/2020 14:00

Today, I was alone at the office. Having held it in all day, I let out the longest, worst-smelling fart of my life. The owner of the company, investigating the odd noise, opened my office door. When the stench hit him, he walked backwards all the way to his office, staring at me, in silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 473

You deserved it 607

By The Draught of Living Death - 17/07/2018 15:00

Today, I shared an elevator alone with an attractive co-worker. On our way up, she let out a loud, noxious rip. She covered her nose and mouth while giving me an accusing look, as I said with a straight face, "Excuse you." Later, I received a note from HR for harassment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 607

You deserved it 273

Get a load of this

By Zoro - 13/09/2023 21:00 - Canada - Burnaby

Today, I had a wet fart with liquid in my underwear that I could smell. I let the one guy in front of me take the elevator so he wouldn't smell me. When the next empty elevator showed up, seven people started lining up behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 600

You deserved it 174

By stink - 01/07/2015 02:40 - Australia - Sydney

Today, after working alone in a room all day, I let a fart sneak out. Just then, my drop dead gorgeous boss and two new girls walked in. I could literally see them hit the stench and cringe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 446

You deserved it 4 980

By Anonymous - 27/06/2015 19:58

Today, I wore flip-flops to work. Just as I walked onto the elevator, they made a sound very close to that of a fart. About 10 seconds later, some asshole let out a silent but deadly fart, earning me a bunch of disgusted looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 463

You deserved it 4 859

By yogapants - 24/09/2010 20:21 - Switzerland

Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 247

You deserved it 14 862

By Boss Troubles - 17/03/2015 06:12 - United States - Anaheim

Today, my boss insisted I go in front of him up the stairs. Out of respect, I insisted he go first. After a few seconds of back and forth insisting, he went. The reason he wanted me to go first was because he had to fart. I inhaled the raunchy gas for over three flights of stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 827

You deserved it 12 370

Sorry, I…

By Anonymous - 07/02/2015 14:33 - United States - Brownwood

Today, my boss was telling everyone his mother recently passed away and he'll be off work for a while. I'd been holding in painful gas for a while, so I tried to ease it out. It turned into a long, squeaky fart in front of everyone. Everyone glared at me as if I was trying to be funny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 827

You deserved it 6 950

He who smelled it…

By Anonymous - 31/01/2015 15:08 - United States - Venus

Today, my boss let me sit in on a board meeting. It was awesome until the guy next to me let out a vile fart, then looked at me in disgust, causing the others to look at me in disgust too. When I told my boss what really happened, he told me to grow up and stop blaming the other guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 046

You deserved it 2 706

Morning hell

By BillLumberg - 03/02/2009 06:42 - United States

Today, I released a noxious, unforgiving fart in my cubicle not thinking anything of it. You know, one of those sulfurous clouds you get the morning after a few good beers. Moments later, my manager walks in to talk about work. It's 7:30 in the morning, no one else is around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 602

You deserved it 24 806

PrickHead 0

Monday 6 June 2011 1:02

could of been worse... could of shit ur pants...

ryrywakaka 0

Monday 6 June 2011 1:03

LOL you should sniff it all up . take it for the team

Comments

Aqua299 0

Monday 6 June 2011 3:12

next time, try holding it in :)

Saltime 0

Monday 6 June 2011 3:15

Not the best thing to do in an elevator...

pan1cked 0

Monday 6 June 2011 3:15

I'm sorry, I laughed really hard at this one. but that really does suck! let's hope it wasn't a girl who submitted this one.

dookiedoo 0

Monday 6 June 2011 3:27

I would've just said **** it and been like yep well this is akward sir how are you.

musicchick1712 0

Monday 6 June 2011 3:33

Lol I love the way you worded it "leaving us to marinate in the fumes" lmfao

rbubbles 20

Monday 6 June 2011 9:29

me too, like they're pieces of meat marinating lol

heyred 11

Monday 6 June 2011 3:43

Next time, be courteous and get off at a closer floor and find another elevator.

skyeyez9 24

Monday 6 June 2011 3:47

could have held it in?

TheJester12 15

Monday 6 June 2011 4:01

usually steaks marinate, not the fumes from an asshole. thanks, now I can never eat marinated steak without half expecting to taste ass

IscoreOnU 19

Monday 6 June 2011 4:08

Nice wording. Very descriptive

CallMeHush 0

Monday 6 June 2011 4:10

OP, You Win! Everyone would like to shit on the boss every now and then.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I learned that dirty talk does NOT get me off. My boyfriend and I were having sex and I said, "I'm going to come" during the beginning of my orgasm. My orgasm immediately stopped right after I said that. I'd managed to turn myself off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 337

You deserved it 15 970

Today, I called the police regarding people speeding down my street, because I was worried for my young kids. On the way home from my daughter's ballet class, I got pulled over two blocks away from my house and got a $150 speeding ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 799

You deserved it 118 563

The Top

Today, I was just taking a wank with my laptop on low battery. Almost finished when my laptop died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 476

You deserved it 56 493

Today, I was taking a piss at the urinal when a fly started buzzing around my head. It started getting in my face, so I tried to swat it away. After about 10 seconds of intense swatting, I looked down to find I had pissed all over my shoes and down the front of my trousers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 941

You deserved it 61 814

Today, my dad reactivated a digital clock we had lying around, and accidentally set an alarm on it. For 1 a.m.. So guess who went hunting for that noise in the middle of night. And guess who banished the thing to the living room, then forgot about it, and slept on the sofa in said living room. Or tried to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 636

You deserved it 211

Today, I walked in on my dad masturbating to a nude photo of my mum on the computer. She passed away four years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 632

You deserved it 1 076

Today, I was on the bus during rush hour. A fly started buzzing around my head, and I swatted at it, at the exact moment the woman beside me decided to get out of her seat and put her face straight in the path of my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 021

You deserved it 3 101

Today, my friend pushed me into the swimming pool. Unfortunately, we were eight feet away from the actual pool, so I face-planted and rolled in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 904

You deserved it 3 709