Animals: Today, I was cooking bacon while my dog watched me, drooling....

By fuckendog - 25/07/2014 06:05 - Australia - Virginia

Today, I was cooking bacon while my dog watched me, drooling. I thought this was funny and I teased her a bit. I then slipped in the drool as I was carrying the bacon and she got to enjoy it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 227

You deserved it 55 760

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Same thing different taste

As a treat

By Undercooked - 24/09/2013 19:08 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, my girlfriend made bacon sandwiches for lunch. I didn't want to be rude, but I couldn't help but mention that the bacon smelled and tasted weird. I thought it may have expired. She said not to worry because she used the dry bacon under the counter. Those were dog treats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 080

You deserved it 4 767

By Anonymous - 22/10/2011 04:07 - United States

Today, while cooking with my girlfriend, I thought it would be funny to slap her with a raw porkchop. She thought it would be funny to throw the hot cooking grease on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 417

You deserved it 54 828

Bad boy

By Anonymous - 05/10/2013 20:23 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, I realized that my dog is an evil genius. As I sat down to have a snack, he barked as if he saw someone outside. I went to check it out, but nobody was there. When I returned, I found my dog on the table finishing off my bacon sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 077

You deserved it 8 753

By Anonymous - 04/08/2016 21:25

Today, I made myself a snack. I took a seemingly clean plate from the sink which had been used earlier for scrambled eggs. Only after I'd made the snack did I remember I let my dog lick the plate clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 995

You deserved it 15 565

By Face - 09/01/2010 10:12 - Australia

Today, I got hit in the face with a piece of bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 345

You deserved it 34 735

And they say romance is dead…

By BaconBreathBlonde - 30/10/2009 00:33 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out, holding hands, and he was playing with a strand of my hair. I thought the whole thing was very romantic. He then said he loved how my mouth tasted like bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 034

You deserved it 7 724

By FishFlingingMonkey - 22/08/2015 03:55 - Canada - Saint John

Today, I was eating and my dog kept bothering me. She kept scratching my legs for food, so I took a large piece of fish from my plate and tossed it out into the hallway. It flew right into my mother's face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 299

You deserved it 8 115

Tasty!

By Andrew Williams - 12/01/2023 06:00

Today, on the kitchen counter, there was a plate that had snacks on it. I decided to take a bite. I spat it out. Later on, my mother told me it was dog food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 203

You deserved it 770

By FrozenAnonymus - 14/07/2016 18:05 - Czech Republic - Prague

Today, I was laying on a couch with my dog watching TV when I heard my dog fart. I looked at her, she looked at me and started waving her tail, blowing it into my direction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 851

You deserved it 1 520

Dangerous words

By lily - 30/08/2009 20:17 - United States

Today, my friend and I were making sandwiches at his house. His family's dog wandered over just as I dropped a large chunk of cheddar on the floor. The dog snatched it up and ran away with it. I yelled after it, jokingly, that I hoped it would choke and die. It did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 143

You deserved it 54 637

1dvs_bstd 41

Friday 25 July 2014 16:33

Smart and strategic by your dog. Drooled for you to fall. it was intentional, i tells ya.

Leodak 16

Friday 25 July 2014 16:33

Don't be a dick to your dog then.

Comments

vexer 1

Friday 25 July 2014 16:50

Now cook your dog and eat it. itll taste like bacon

91hayek 31

Friday 25 July 2014 16:50

Good thing you slipped because she was probably close to ruining you by prank calling the police many times from your phone or taking loans out in your name and ruining your credit while using the money to buy vegan bacon and change out your supply when you weren't looking. You just escaped that vengeance and you don't even know it. It's satiated; for now.

slipstreak 10

Friday 25 July 2014 18:49

Overkill.

toaster123 11

Friday 25 July 2014 22:36

WTF

B90 9

Friday 25 July 2014 16:51

Smells like karma to me.

Nilorak 24

Friday 25 July 2014 18:51

Smells like bacon to me.

Edumcg 24

Saturday 26 July 2014 7:29

Smells like teen spirit to me.

False_Stupidity 41

Saturday 26 July 2014 22:14

Smells like Satan's unholy ass gas... oh wait, that's me. 0.o

B90 9

Friday 25 July 2014 16:53

I'd say he deserves it for teasing his dog without intention of giving the dog any sort of treat. Not because of the type of bacon he might be feeding her.