Kids: Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her.... - FML

By Username - 13/09/2010 01:38 - France

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 363

You deserved it 31 395

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Same thing different taste

By Aldoch - 30/05/2012 22:41

Today, my daughter is still acting out her teenage issues. This morning, when I told her to, "Have a nice day" she screamed at me, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 030

You deserved it 4 836

By Anonymous - 29/03/2013 01:13 - United States - Sunnyvale

Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 194

You deserved it 18 840

By Black Cat 13 - 04/09/2010 06:52 - United States

Today, at work, a little girl was misbehaving. Her dad told her that she would look like me when she grows up. The little girl look horrified while Daddy laughed and kept reassuring her he was "just kidding." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 135

You deserved it 3 514

Fight Club Penguin

By mama bear - 05/06/2020 20:00

Today, I punched an older woman in the face. I only hit her after she grabbed my 4-year-old daughter and told her to, "stop dancing like a whore!" My daughter was so terrified, she peed her pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 011

You deserved it 213

By Wmsys32pr9 - 30/03/2009 05:06 - United States

Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 273 821

You deserved it 30 873

Not her fault neither mine

By Shut up loser! - 02/12/2019 03:00

Today, my 4 year old daughter got royally annoyed at my uncle who won't stop surprise tickling her by poking her waist. When he went for another, she punched him square on the nose, making him a laughing stock. Not accepting that he got owned, he started preaching about child discipline to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 519

You deserved it 461

It's not what you think

By shway - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was at the grocery with my 4 year-old daughter. She needed me to tie one of her shoes so I bent down. When I was done, I tickled her under the armpit, and she screamed, "Don't touch me there!" Everyone in the store turned to stare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 952

You deserved it 7 429

By tenthousandspoon - 13/09/2010 00:08 - New Zealand

Today, at work, a three year old chucked a chocolate bar at me. It hit me square in the face. Her father praised her for her "quality arm." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 833

You deserved it 3 048

By jessi - 02/12/2011 13:22 - United States

Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 141

You deserved it 6 661

By uterurist - 22/11/2014 18:37 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, my son trained his little sister to walk up to strangers and whimper: "My mommy punches me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 846

You deserved it 2 909

Next

Top comments

Mclovin_95 0

Monday 13 September 2010 9:03

haha what a little bitch xD

3ddie_the_head 0

Monday 13 September 2010 9:04

Smart ass kid.

Comments

XexyWinch 0

Monday 13 September 2010 14:54

Hahahahaha. Oh ur going to have fun with her as she grows up! You better bring your "A" game now so it won't be worse later.

cyaneyedangel 2

Monday 13 September 2010 14:59

why do you need to spank her? I've never had to spank my child for him to learn right from wrong

oceanbeauty 17

Monday 13 September 2010 15:01

lol dude your daughter is a bamf! she'll do great things! :)

jfarrow9703 11

Monday 13 September 2010 15:06

spank that ass, thats whats wrong with kids these days

Natsuki41 0

Monday 13 September 2010 15:27

kids are sponges she has to be soaking this up from somewhere >_< I wud kiss her for being so cute then spank her so she doesn't think it's funny

BCBUDFTW 0

Monday 13 September 2010 15:30

If my child had said that I would have looked down, said " Oh it's already been broughten!" and spanked (not beaten) right then and there. Having said that, my child would not have been so rude and disrespectful because he has been raised well and is very polite and loving. :D

ShotCaller82 0

Monday 13 September 2010 18:21

broughten?

aback 4

Monday 13 September 2010 15:32

She already knows you're her bitch.

MarsDeeKiwiBird 0

Monday 13 September 2010 15:36

If I were you I'd be crackin' up, honestly.

monkeykiller77 0

Monday 13 September 2010 15:37

not an fml, I have a high pain threshhold, I used to do it

ltsmark 0

Monday 13 September 2010 15:42

She's gangster

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I agree, your life sucks 4 341

You deserved it 980

Today, my friends were coming to pick me up from volleyball practice. When their car pulled up, I jumped in. It was really quiet, so I looked up, only to find I had gotten in the wrong car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 322

You deserved it 10 681