Geek: Today, I actually heard my 14 year old son muse to himself, "If... - FML

By nomorexbox - 26/04/2011 19:20 - United States

Today, I actually heard my 14 year old son muse to himself, "If I can drive drunk in Grand Theft Auto, how hard could it be in real life?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 054

You deserved it 13 446

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/06/2019 22:00

Today, I let my 19-year-old son drive my Lexus to his date. At 11:00 p.m., I watched him pull into the driveway with a broken taillight, marks and scratches all over the car, the front bumper missing, and him being nearly passed out because he's so drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 040

You deserved it 1 610

By don'tdrinkthat - 03/11/2013 22:27 - United States - Quincy

Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 252

You deserved it 4 818

By ButItWasRareDad! - 03/08/2016 22:21 - United States - Chicago

Today, my 15-year-old son was waiting in the car for me after driving around to build up hours for his permit. He then decided it was a good idea to quickly drive over to catch a Pokemon nearby. He didn't count on getting pulled over for texting and driving while underage without an adult though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 550

You deserved it 2 132

By Anonymous - 09/08/2013 14:22 - Canada - Langley

Today, I let my son take my car out for a spin, since he just got his licence. He didn't make it out of our street before totaling it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 413

You deserved it 15 159

By Anonymous - 20/09/2013 22:52 - United States

Today, thanks to Grand Theft Auto, I found myself seriously thinking about holding up an armored bank truck when I saw it in traffic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 691

You deserved it 38 576

Well done

By Anonymous - 17/10/2015 11:41 - United States - Mechanicsville

Today, I had to bail my son out of jail, because he's a wimp and wouldn't last a night in there. His crime: pissing through the open windows of passing cars after losing a bet with his friends. I feel like if he gave me grandkids, they'd be born with half a brain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 313

You deserved it 4 290

Teenagers these days

By prostitott - 04/05/2013 07:22

Today, I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her for half-an-hour I finally said, "At least you're not doing drugs." She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said, "At least I'm not a prostitute?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 508

You deserved it 15 381

By StockedWithJuice - 06/07/2013 15:14 - United States - Austin

Today, I found out that my 16-year-old son bought a huge amount of grape juice, because he thought he could store it under his bed and wait for it to turn to wine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 793

You deserved it 5 334

By Anonymous - 16/05/2015 00:50 - United States

Today, my 14-year-old daughter told me she's pregnant and plans on dropping out of school to live a life on the road with her boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 214

You deserved it 7 582

By Anonymous - 09/11/2012 18:28 - Argentina - Villa Sarmiento

Today, I was giving my son a driving lesson. He blatantly ran a red light, so I told him to pull over to let me drive us home. As I walked over to the driver-side door, he instead locked me out and drove off by himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 960

You deserved it 7 366

Next

Top comments

docscientist 9

Wednesday 27 April 2011 0:15

The influence of things on stupid people.

Cmliedtke 0

Wednesday 27 April 2011 1:03

just about every teenager I know has been playing M games since they were like 10... I guarantee you 85% of all Call of Duty players are below 18..-_-

Comments

chunkeechunks 0

Wednesday 27 April 2011 4:56

91 its not an estimate if you gurantee it

garfield224 0

Wednesday 27 April 2011 4:57

Beat some sense into that dipshit

rangermedic77 5

Wednesday 27 April 2011 4:57

you all sound like ficking nerds right now. I play xbox to but come one, fighting about ratings?...

paolosacco 0

Wednesday 27 April 2011 5:01

you're statement is incorrect, no one plays grand theft auto anymore

Xephyr 1

Wednesday 27 April 2011 5:01

That's why you don't let your kids play those games. Seriously.

xalerion 0

Wednesday 27 April 2011 5:02

#208 We could fight about grammar and spelling if you'd like. :P

KingDingALing 9

Wednesday 27 April 2011 5:04

What are guys talking about? Video games don't influence kids badly! I mean, look at me, I turned out alright! Well...sort of...not really... Ok, that was a bad example...shit.

astriofou 0

Wednesday 27 April 2011 5:07

FNV for life NCR! but its just a game..

CatchtheTIMO 2

Wednesday 27 April 2011 5:08

did u buy the game for him? if so i hope he hijacks ur car while ur in it OP

BustaCapInYoAss 5

Wednesday 27 April 2011 5:11

HEY, HEY YOU! I LIKE BOOBS AND CHEETO'S >:D

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The Top

Today, I discovered my 3-year-old daughter's artistic skills. She managed to draw an elaborate mural on our living room wall. The masterpiece? A stick figure family, including our dog, but instead of a tail, he has a second head. She of course used permanent markers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 332

You deserved it 140

Today, I went to a water park with a group of friends. As I went down the water slide, some complete turdwaffle of a kid in the water kicked his leg out in line with my crotch. The moment I hit the bottom was the moment I think I became sterile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 394

You deserved it 3 447

The Top

Today, I got a haircut. I wanted three inches cut off. When the lady finished, she had cut off everything but three inches of my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 924

You deserved it 348

Today, my landlord informed me that from now on, she'd prefer if I paid my rent in cash each month. Apparently, I "look sketchy" and she didn't "ever want to deal with the hassle of a bounced check." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 592

You deserved it 2 276

Today, I was placed firmly in the friend-zone. By my wife. We've been married 10 years. She doesn't want a divorce, she says it'd be too "time-consuming." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 689

You deserved it 2 506

Today, I realized I wasn't getting notifications for my voicemail, so I decided to check it and found out that I had 3 job offerings that are no longer an option. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 046

You deserved it 3 750

Today, I was teaching a special techniques class for ballet and was focusing on pirouettes. I was teaching a group of 8 year-olds, and one student could do perfect triple turns one after the other. I still can't do them, and I've been dancing for 15 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 219

You deserved it 6 095

Today, my husband is finally fully recovered from getting decompression sickness during our scuba diving vacation. Today is also the day I snapped my femur in half while skiing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 067

You deserved it 281