Health, Food and Awkward: Ouch

Ouch

By kb123 - 05/05/2019 20:00

Today, I'm visiting my wife's home country for the first time. To avoid the spicy street food, I bought something labelled "Fruit salad" from a street vendor. I didn't know even Pakistani fruit salad can be very spicy too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 935

You deserved it 355

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Same thing different taste

By my bravado's gonna kill me one day - 10/08/2018 13:00

Today, as a big fan of spicy food and a huge challenge seeker, I decided to try the hottest burger I could order. Despite being warned by a waitress, I went for it. After eating a third, I had trouble breathing from the spiciness. The waitress was smirking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 264

You deserved it 3 873

By Anonymous - 14/04/2012 11:10 - Egypt - Cairo

Today, my parents invited my Muslim boyfriend over for dinner for the first time. My mother made sure that everything including the salad had pork in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 556

You deserved it 7 472

Hangry boi

By Anonymous - 11/04/2022 14:00

Today, thanks to my wife’s obsession with expensive foods like chutney, relishes, exotic spices, and preserved foreign vegetables and herbs, I'm literally staring into a fridge full of glass jars, with a door that barely stays closed, and yet has nothing inside suitable to eat for my dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 910

You deserved it 215

By halfie - 26/09/2015 05:06 - United States - Pigeon Forge

Today, while on my first ever date, I ordered a really hot curry, hoping to impress my date. "Yeah," I said smoothly, "not everyone can handle spicy food." When I took a bite, my eyes watered, my mouth burned, and I had to plead for water in between moaning like a dying baboon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 516

You deserved it 33 448

By Coldsnap - 12/08/2011 17:25 - Sweden

Today, my father tricked me into eating a Tasmanian habanero, saying it was just another pepper. The burning in my mouth was unbearable, but nothing compared to when I took a shit later in the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 837

You deserved it 5 013

Impressive, dude

By Anonymous - 06/02/2023 15:00

Today, I was on a first date at high-end Indian restaurant. I tried to impress my date by ordering the spiciest dish on the menu, only to find out it was way too hot for me to handle. I ruined the entire meal by coughing, choking, and drinking five gallons of water with tears streaming down my face for at least 40 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 1 931

By DMStarsky - 21/10/2011 17:19 - United States

Today, I ate a bowl of my girlfriend's homemade chili. She went a little heavy on the spices, but I ate it anyway. An hour later, I can now say that if it burns going in, it will explode coming out your rear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 579

You deserved it 4 691

By perfectman - 12/06/2012 10:34 - Australia - Sydney

Today, it was my first time meeting my fiancé's parents. My future mother-in-law had cooked steak, hearing it was my favourite food. I somehow managed to bite my tongue, and then blurt out "Fuck!" just after she asked me how it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 294

You deserved it 8 367

Delicious

By drchinky888 - 18/09/2016 17:10

Today, I was having dinner at my aunt's house who just migrated to Germany from India and doesn't know any German. I asked for the recipe of a dish and she said that she has been buying these cans with cute kitty picture and just adds spices to it. Cat food is delicious I must admit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 350

You deserved it 994

Coworkers aren't friends

By KisstheChef - 28/12/2022 00:00

Today, in an act of friendship, I made chicken curry for a colleague and brought it to work. She looked excited and squealed, "Yum!" When leaving the office at 5pm, she told me she was "taking it to eat at home." But at 7pm, during my routine snooping around for snacks, I found the curry hidden behind a shelf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 260

ajh1800 25

Sunday 5 May 2019 20:27

Since your wife is from there, why not just tell her you don't like spicy food and ask her what you'll be able to eat instead of just guessing?

julfunky 29

Sunday 5 May 2019 22:04

If asking what food isn’t spicy is considered imposing then he’s in the wrong relationship.

Comments

ajh1800 25

Sunday 5 May 2019 20:27

Since your wife is from there, why not just tell her you don't like spicy food and ask her what you'll be able to eat instead of just guessing?

Gerardo Gonzalez 1

Sunday 5 May 2019 20:48

he doesnt want to impose on his wife and accidentally make her think he doesnt like her home country

julfunky 29

Sunday 5 May 2019 22:04

If asking what food isn’t spicy is considered imposing then he’s in the wrong relationship.

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 5 May 2019 21:59

And tomorrow, your butthole is going to learn that lesson, too.

bloopaloop 27

Sunday 5 May 2019 22:39

They have great bacon there. It’s not spicy at all!

Shabnam Moghal 14

Monday 6 May 2019 1:47

Hi OP. Pakistani here. Please don't eat anything being made on the streets. Drink only bottled mineral water. Please also talk to your wife about your spicy food problem. She'd probably much rather know about it so she can be careful and help prevent you becoming sick. Have a safe healthy holiday.

kdmittens 9

Monday 6 May 2019 11:17

yes we have a masala for fruits as well.. its called chaat masala :p next time ask them to not put it on your fruit salad although i would strongly advice you to eat home cooked food street food is not good for the stomach of locals as well