Sex, Awkward and Intimacy: Kinky - FML

Kinky

By Anonymous - 10/01/2011 03:03 - United States

Spicy

Today, I had a panic attack because my boyfriend thought it would be sexy to choke me in the middle of sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 826

You deserved it 6 139

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

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Same thing different taste

The language of love

By Paicked - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, my boyfriend told me he loves me. Instead of saying it back, I had a panic attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 637

You deserved it 17 846

By Marian - 23/03/2009 19:37 - United States

Spicy

Today, I had an anxiety attack when I was hanging out with my boyfriend. He pulled me close to him and I started to feel better, until he put my hand down his pants and around his penis and said, "Here! Try this to take your mind off it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 730

You deserved it 9 029

Empathetic panic

By Anonymous - 20/05/2014 16:31 - Singapore - Singapore

Spicy

Today, in the middle of my boyfriend finally giving me an orgasm, I had an anxiety attack, which caused him to have an attack of his own. I guess there is such a thing as having too much in common with your partner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 360

You deserved it 7 617

Overdoing it

By Anonymous - 29/05/2020 08:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend convinced me to "dirty talk" with him. I'd never done it before, so I figured I would give it a go. I ended up getting so excited that I had an anxiety attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 621

You deserved it 404

I'm coming !

By ally - 03/02/2009 19:34 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with a guy that I just met, and when I thought he was about to orgasm, he actually had an asthma attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 226

You deserved it 8 513

Psychopath's joke

By hannieannie - 20/11/2019 01:00

Today, I’m still recovering from last night. I fell asleep before my boyfriend. He thought it would be funny to stand at the bottom of the bed with a knife and wake me up. I screamed so much that I wet myself and had a panic attack. He recorded the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 026

You deserved it 251

Trigger warning

By Anonymous - 13/10/2023 05:30 - United States - Aiken

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend and I told him that I was going to tickle him, to which he responded me how he’d “crack” me in the head so that I’d never even think about tickling him again. It threw me into a panic attack and people laughed. I’m a survivor of domestic violence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 827

You deserved it 210

By JRLJLS - 15/04/2013 09:09 - United States - Lehigh Acres

Spicy

Today, I had phone sex with my boyfriend. He had an asthma attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 940

You deserved it 11 513

By Anonymous - 24/08/2013 22:31 - Isle of Man - Douglas

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. As I started getting close to having my first ever orgasm, I got extremely short of breath and started hyperventilating. His reaction was to cover my mouth to shut me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 266

You deserved it 7 762

By rebeccacaissie - 21/11/2010 18:16 - United States

Today, I was being a little playful with my boyfriend when we began wrestling. He then put me in a choking headlock and wouldn't let me out until I "tapped out". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 596

You deserved it 8 895

Next

Top comments

hideyoself 4

Monday 10 January 2011 9:10

He watches too much ****..

youfailed18 0

Monday 10 January 2011 9:06

What a doucher.

Comments

withasmile 3

Monday 10 January 2011 16:07

I like all kinds of play. But anything that could potentially end my life is not worth 'an intense ******.' I get it - I'm not judging what turns people on, but as a nurse whose seen the unintended end results of people doing dangerous things for fun/whatever - I reserve the right to think it's pretty stupid. And yes- he should ask you. Also - please take a look at his overall behavior towards you. He could be an abusive, sociopath. Or he could be an innocent (stupid) experimenter without much sense. Just my two cents.

yeahiknow0 0

Monday 10 January 2011 16:13

Wtf

Nullcharacter 0

Monday 10 January 2011 16:14

DTMFA. Safe breath play is informed and consensual. Only a creeper would just spring it on you. Run far and fast.

EvilDave 13

Monday 10 January 2011 16:18

While it sucks that he didn't ask you about it, YDI for dating someone who would spring that kind of thing on you.

ReginalUT 0

Monday 10 January 2011 18:55

Quit being such a prude. Chocking can be very erotic if done correctly and done within reason.

kandina 0

Monday 10 January 2011 19:48

Douche? Ha, well I actually like being choked and stuff lol..so do alot of people. Guess he thought you might too xD

boomstick 0

Monday 10 January 2011 19:57

Your boyfriend is an idiot. You never, EVER pull that sort of shit on anyone without discussing it first. He sounds like a psychopath and if I were you, I would dump his stupid ass.

redtigerlily 5

Monday 10 January 2011 20:27

Sorry but I love to get choked. Not enough to die obviously. But I definitely love the struggle for air.

entwined 0

Monday 10 January 2011 21:09

yeah I love that shit too :D

TheNinjaBuffalo 0

Monday 10 January 2011 22:31

that is sexy..lmao

boopityboppity 11

Tuesday 11 January 2011 5:13

Kay, you seem to be implying that the two options are mutually exclusive. There should be an option (c) for all of the above.

Yondeme 2

Thursday 13 January 2011 4:56

ur sexy..lmao

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The Top

Today, I had dinner with my girlfriend of five months along with my mom and dad. It all was going fine until my mom asked aloud, "Everything going smooth for you in the bedroom?" to which my girlfriend replied, "No." I'd actually been painting the master bedroom at my parent's house for some extra cash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 443

You deserved it 4 300

Today, I went to see the doctor for my daughter and myself. I fell two weeks ago, I thought I'd sprained my ankle but apparently I broke my leg instead. I’ve been limping around for two weeks. My daughter was sick, which is the only reason I got X-rayed. It may need screws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 904

You deserved it 186

The Top

Today, I was sitting next to an attractive man. Much to my surprise, he started stroking his foot against mine. I was happy at the flirting, because I've been attracted to him forever, so I played along. That's when he stood up and explained he was trying to stretch out a cramp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 783

You deserved it 11 769

Today, my wife's water broke so I drove her to the hospital. After 16 hours without labor, I went home to get a little sleep. Four hours later I got the call and ran outside to find that my car was towed from my parking space. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 076

You deserved it 1 024

Today, while going through airport security the lady asked why I folded everything so small. I said that I was going away for a month and needed to fit a lot of stuff in only one bag. She smiled, nodded and then dumped my luggage to search for "drugs and other illegal teen things." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 967

You deserved it 3 310

Today, I discovered my 18 year old son has been peeing on the carpet when he is too lazy to get out of bed in the morning and blaming it on the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 587

You deserved it 7 671

Today, my mother told me to my face that if she could do it all over again, she wouldn't have had kids. Thanks, Mum. It's not like I asked to be born. FML

I agree, your life sucks 986

You deserved it 105

Today, my roommate's extremely loud and obnoxious alarm went off six times, waking me up each time, before she finally gave up on hitting the snooze button and went back to sleep for good. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 186

You deserved it 3 841