Sex and Intimacy: I'm coming! - FML

I'm coming!

By anonymous - 24/02/2010 05:05 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend told me I look like a fish gasping for breath when I "finish" during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 867

You deserved it 4 479

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Same thing different taste

Power moves

By Travis - 10/09/2021 22:59

Spicy

Today, my wife told me that I take her breath away. However, she was talking about my large stomach hitting her while we have sex and knocking the wind out of her with every thrust. FML

I agree, your life sucks 604

You deserved it 1 189

By cj123 - 23/12/2011 08:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend yelled at me for breathing too much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 489

You deserved it 5 479

By katie - 25/05/2011 08:23

Spicy

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 953

You deserved it 19 160

By lovely - 19/12/2011 06:43 - Netherlands

Spicy

Today, while having sex, my girlfriend suddenly broke down and started crying. Apparently, when I'm horny, my face reminds her of her dead dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 550

You deserved it 4 583

By shopper242 - 22/11/2010 12:29 - France

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend compared my orgasm to that of a beached sea turtle. He demonstrated what he meant in front of all our friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 903

You deserved it 4 096

Romantic afterglow

By easyontheeyes1 - 01/05/2020 02:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Immediately after we'd finished, he said, "Get off, you're making it hard to breathe on top of me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 755

You deserved it 476

By Anonymous - 14/04/2014 20:12 - United States - Ellicott City

Spicy

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 654

You deserved it 8 159

By nick - 27/06/2016 03:44 - United States - Highland Park

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend started making pig noises during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 460

You deserved it 2 106

Nice outing

By Anonymous - 07/12/2019 05:00 - United Kingdom - London

Spicy

Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 377

You deserved it 746

By laury - 09/05/2012 02:05 - Canada - Port Elgin

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 559

You deserved it 3 623

Next

Top comments

babybubz 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 13:16

sooooo.. because fish breathe under water.. I'm gonna assume when you 'finish' you flap around all over the place? yeah you might wanna work on that..

wtgjeremy 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 12:22

tell her she smells like one

Comments

Invioletlight 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 15:35

She saw your "O" face! GASP

JeepGC 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 15:51

lmao... ringmybell ur cute:)

Jrook 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 17:32

lmao... you seem like a tool :)

TandJHire 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 16:21

LMAO, most guys and women have funny faces when they get off so don't be so sensitive geez

amritsidhu6 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 16:52

lmao

CallMeHush 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 17:46

Next time try and look like you have done it before.

mrbuddy 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 18:36

Lots of people look like fish

vtgurlXD 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 18:49

I'm sorry, girlfriend on this site are bitches, and it sux for the guys!! but this is kinda funny!!

marierad 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 19:01

take a pic of her face when shes cuming and show her. i bet she'll shut up after that! lol

hcube 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 19:13

Haven't you fuys seen Office Space? Drew: I'm thinking I might take that new chick from Logistics. If things go well I might be showing her my O-face. "Oh... Oh... Oh!" You know what I'm talkin' about. "Oh!"

giselleluv 0

Wednesday 24 February 2010 19:44

wear a mask?

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Keywords

Management Work Love Jealousy Relatable Mental health Relationship advice Miscellaneous Friends Awkward Health Healthy Lifestyle Ironic Food Birthday Family Money Gifts Mother in law Public freakouts Education Parents Students Exams Pranks Weird Argument AITA Insects Fear

The Top

Today, I had a softball team dinner, and I was sitting with a bunch of girls who were talking about how far they've gone with guys. One girl goes, "I must be the least experienced one here, I've never even kissed a guy!" Surprised, I said, "Me too!" and high-fived her. She was joking. I wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 562

You deserved it 9 847

Today, on my way home, my girlfriend started sexting me, telling me that she was waiting at my house. In my rush to get home to see her, I got pulled over and had to be patted down. He found no weapons, but he did find my stiffy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 961

You deserved it 12 658

The Top

Today, I tried to find myself a friend on Craigslist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 931

You deserved it 8 682

Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 296

You deserved it 4 671

Today, I was driving home from an airport. On the way home, I got a flat tire. Once I was outside the car I realized that I had accidentally locked the car with the keys inside. I was in the middle of nowhere 20 miles from anywhere and couldn't call for help since my phone was in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 728

You deserved it 6 762

Today, I finally finished a gruelling shift at the hospital. I hadn't slept in over 30 hours, so I was happy to get out. I was quickly rushed back in after I collapsed in the parking lot and cracked my head open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 572

You deserved it 1 157

Today, my dentist discovered that, at 21, I still had a baby tooth, and asked if I wanted it pulled. My mouth was already numb, so I said sure. Turns out the numbing wore off. The dentist pulled it anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 596

You deserved it 317

Today, I went out on a first date. He was funny, laidback, and handsome. We had an amazing time but I declined to go back to his house, not wanting to rush things. He said he understood and respected my choice. Later online he bragged about “banging some cheap slut for the price of a meal.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 599

You deserved it 152