Miscellaneous and Court: How very dare you? - FML

How very dare you?

By Anonymous - 25/09/2022 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, in court, I was called a "pompous little gnome" by the woman I was there suing, for destroying my front garden with weed killer. The judge agreed with her and threw the case out for lack of evidence it was actually her that destroyed my garden. FML

I agree, your life sucks 904

You deserved it 173

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 05/12/2014 13:44 - United States - San Bruno

Today, my neighbor showed me footage of my 7-year-old son spraying his beloved rose garden with weed killer. The whole garden is dead as fuck, and I'm now being taken to small claims court. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 858

You deserved it 7 716

Cars can **** right off

By Anonymous - 31/07/2022 18:00

Today, I hate the legal profession with a passion, as I just walked out of court where a lawyer, spouting incomprehensible bollocks in Latin, convinced a judge to let a developer bulldoze a children's playground and part of a forest, to build a second multi-storey car park for the shopping centre across the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 968

You deserved it 160

By dickhead - 10/04/2015 22:17 - United States

Today, I bought a garden gnome to spice up my lawn. Tonight, someone threw it right through my living room window. Not only will the repairs cost a ton, my neighbor keeps saying stupid shit to me, like "You must be shattered" and "Looks like you ain't got a window gnome... more." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 166

You deserved it 3 393

Crimefighters

By Anonymous - 03/07/2009 19:56 - Canada

Today, I was at the park with a friend when I said, "Gotta go, sorry. I've got court in an hour." The lady on the bench next to us then loudly complained how disgusting I was for being a criminal and threw her bird seed at me, dirtying my suit. I'm a lawyer with a case in an hour, not a criminal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 389

You deserved it 3 874

By Anonymous - 24/06/2011 21:22 - United States

Today, my daughter was charged with multiple counts of vandalism and trespassing. It seems she's been sneaking out in the middle of the night, stealing and breaking our neighbors' lawn ornaments. Specifically garden gnomes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 220

You deserved it 7 086

Scruffy 'erbert

By Anonymous - 14/09/2019 00:02 - United Kingdom

Today, I was in the garden of my new house when a neighbour came over and told me to clear off or she would call the owner to tell them they were being burgled. When I told her I was the owner, she said I was clearly unsuitable to be living on this street, and to stop lying before she called the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 140

You deserved it 130

By Anonymous - 30/05/2015 03:07 - United States - Salem

Today, my crazy neighbor screamed at me from her porch for walking "too close" to her plants. I was on the sidewalk. She sprayed me with her hose anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 617

You deserved it 2 117

By Zinfandel - 07/08/2010 06:04 - United States

Today, I decided to clear up some storm damage. I carefully cut a tree that was threatening to fall on my house. It fell on my neighbor's house instead. He's taking me to court for damages. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 176

You deserved it 36 933

By mustanggt - 10/07/2012 15:39 - United States - La Porte

Today, I was in traffic court trying to get out of a ticket. The judge called my defense "complete, unadulterated bullshit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 849

You deserved it 31 204

Trash

By Anonymous - 02/04/2017 16:00

Today, I confronted my lousy, loud, messy neighbors about the trash they throw in my yard. They responded by throwing my trash in their yard, then called the police to report me for vandalism and illegal dumping when I returned their trash. Guess who has a court appearance in two weeks… FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 808

You deserved it 417

Next

Top comments

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 25 September 2022 23:57

If you are a pompous little gnome, maybe it wasn't your garden she was trying to kill with the poison. You should have sued her...for murder!

spinningrecords 14

Sunday 25 September 2022 22:12

Are you a garden gnome?

Comments

spinningrecords 14

Sunday 25 September 2022 22:12

Are you a garden gnome?

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 25 September 2022 23:57

If you are a pompous little gnome, maybe it wasn't your garden she was trying to kill with the poison. You should have sued her...for murder!

dreams2383 18

Monday 26 September 2022 22:44

if you don't have video proof it's hear say. install a camera

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