abcsforelise

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Abcsforelise's favorite FMLs

Blown job

By Noname - 12/03/2009 09:30 - New Zealand

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

agreeclassic 63 973

vote type 1 339 346

By TextLoser - 05/08/2009 13:37 - United States

Today, I was sitting on the bus next to a hot guy who was texting. I sneaked a peek at his phone to see if he was texting a girl so I could know if he was single. As I looked at his screen, he turned it towards me and typed in caps "STOP BEING A CREEPER." He got out of his seat and off the bus. FML

agreeclassic 9 863

vote type 1 86 794

By notsexy - 28/07/2009 22:28 - United States

Today, my boyfriend came over so that we could have some "fun". It turns out, his idea of foreplay is squishing my breasts together and making them talk. FML

agreeclassic 55 789

vote type 1 8 449

By bsaucedo - 28/07/2009 05:00 - United States

Today, I was at the Wild Animal Park. There were bees everywhere. One brave bee, thinking he was Mr. Macho, flew right down my tank top in between my boobs. I freaked the hell out and ended up screaming and pulling down my shirt to get the bee out. I flashed about 10 kids and their families. FML

agreeclassic 52 939

vote type 1 9 920

bsaucedo app_comment_confession_title

bsaucedo 0

Wednesday 29 July 2009 9:19

who says my tank top was low cut and my cleavage was showing ? my shirt doesnt need to be low cut for a bee to fly in. so you deserve to be run over :)

By Anonymous - 28/07/2009 01:20 - United States

Today, I was sitting in a coffee shop when the weird guy who had been pacing the store talking to himself approached our table. He looked at me, and in all seriousness, said, "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but your butt crack is showing." FML

agreeclassic 17 292

vote type 1 45 066