Earbleach
By Anonymous - 01/05/2013 16:13 - United States
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By Anonymous - 01/05/2013 16:13 - United States
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Denver
By Anonymous - 25/03/2015 19:00 - United States - Point Pleasant Beach
By NoCnNoJustice - 17/04/2015 13:49 - Australia - Brisbane
By vmml97 - 01/08/2013 04:32 - United States - Erie
Hey. Firstly, I am Canadian, and in Ontario, you can carry a folding (not spring assisted or butterfly) knife, with a blade under 3 or 4 inches in length. You can look up the rules if you want. So yes, I was carrying it legally. And why do I carry a knife? Because I use it as a tool. It's not a weapon. I was in the forest, it was a tool. He said he needed it as a tool. I believed him, it's a logical claim. I can understand why it would seem like a ridiculously dumb idea to let someone borrow your knife, but you need to understand two things: I live in a small, Canadian town. I literally can not remember the last time anyone was attacked here, so I did not fear attack. Also, we were deep in the forest, where there are many reasons that one needs a knife. So, I let him use the knife because he said he needed it. I know it's kind of stupid, and I'm never lending out a knife again, but oh well. He seemed like a nice, polite, well put together guy. He didn't look like your typical mugger, so that's why I lent it out. He had obviously seen the clip of the knife, as I carry it clipped to the inside of my pocket, as that's the law where I live. And people saying "a woman in a forest, alone, lending out her knife to weird men.... bad idea", I agree. But, I'm not the type of woman you want to fight with, and I'm not some delicate woman alone and afraid. I can hold my own. But, I do have too much faith in humanity, and I trust people too much. As for people saying "track down your phone", I did. I live close to the forest, so I just ran back home and tracked the phone down. I had it back within a few hours. I lost the $70 in my wallet, but that's not much. He was a stupid thief. The police took care of him. And, by the way, I never got my knife back :( I'm gonna go buy another knife, and I'm never gonna lend it out again. In the end, it was scary (I've never been mugged before) and I lost $100 ($70 cash from my wallet, and the knife was worth $30 ish), but I've learned a lesson. Thanks, everyone. And yes, I know I deserved it!
You'd be right! I'll try and condense the story for you. So basically, I was playing Counter-Strike: Global Offensive (the game mentioned in my post) and my team was messing about and killing each other. In my frustration, I called the one who was the most annoying on my team a baked potato. It seems that he too must have been frustrated, because the next thing I know, he's called a vote to kick me from my team. Since I'm at the top of the leaderboard and I'm carrying my team (despite losing by a huge margin), I think to myself "Well, it's not like they're going to vote 'Yes', they need me on this team if we're ever going to win!" But, to my surprise, they all accepted the vote and I was kicked, consequently resulting in a 7 day ban from Competitive Matchmaking. Well, that's it! I hope this backstory behind it was sufficient.