brmsnipes

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Brmsnipes's favorite FMLs

Home again

By GD. - 21/02/2009 22:11 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I cried and told him that I loved him. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cared. I threw the quarter in his face and ran. I waited for the bus, but when I got on, I realized I was 25 cents short of the fare. I walked home in the rain. FML

agreeclassic 299 926

vote type 1 67 624

By thisisavirus.exe - 31/12/2013 20:57 - United States - Sherwood

Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time. The first thing he did was show me a bullet, then he basically said that if I don't submit to his daughter's every whim, that bullet will end my life. FML

agreeclassic 46 229

vote type 1 5 554

By Rhyno - 05/05/2009 15:37 - United States

Today, I went to meet my girlfriends parents for the first time. I accidentally drove past their house the first time, but saw the whole family outside waiting to meet me. I pulled a U-Turn and heard a thud. The whole family watched me run over their dog. FML

agreeclassic 486

vote type 1 99

Rhyno app_comment_confession_title

Rhyno 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 23:53

To explain a bit more in detail, I pulled a U-Turn and the dog ran out of the yard and boom... It was a medium sized dog, I drive an SUV and didn't see it as I was making the turn. I didn't even know they had a dog... haha The following 20 minutes were probably the most uncomfortable of my life, after I knew the dog was fine I kinda laughed nervously and left. "Hi I'm the guy who is dating your daughter, sorry about the dog"... Live and you learn.

By Kaeyne - 24/03/2009 15:41 - United States

Today, I had an elaborate plan to ask this girl to Prom, and it was going to take a few minutes to set up. I asked my friend to distract her. He decided to distract her by asking her to Prom. She said "Yes". FML

agreeclassic 281 350

vote type 1 47 598

By ScoobieDoo - 20/03/2009 04:15 - United States

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

agreeclassic 545

vote type 1 99