Maltastic

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San Antonio, USA
33 years-old
Sunday 07 June 1992
Not specified

A propos de Maltastic

A college course taking Jr. at a small school who spends most of her free time reading or working on the newspaper, lacking a social life of any kind, who'll do anything she can to make it into the world of Design and Magazines. (To be updated)

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Fucked!

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Maltastic's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 22/03/2009 02:36 - United States

Today, one of my co-workers invited me to a cookout at her house with some other people from my new job. She said to wear my suit. Assuming she had a pool, I showed up in a bikini, only to find everyone else wearing business attire and staring at me like I had lost my mind. FML

agreeclassic 26 052

vote type 1 69 645

By Anonymous - 21/03/2009 07:18 - Canada

Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML

agreeclassic 77 386

vote type 1 13 310

Love is love

By SpiderMan - 12/03/2009 00:23 - United States

Today, I was masturbating into a sock when I felt something on my cock. I quickly ripped the sock off and threw it on the floor… and watched a huge spider come scurrying out. I just inadvertently fucked a spider. FML

agreeclassic 57 486

vote type 1 106 849

By Dang-ItsDanielle - 07/03/2009 18:28 - United States

Today, I was pushing my 4 year old on the swing. I did what we call our "under doggie push": I throw her up in the air while I run underneath her before she hits me coming back down. I walked away to get my water and she yelled across the park "Can we do it doggie-style again?" FML

agreeclassic 62 378

vote type 1 19 435

By oconron - 06/03/2009 06:09 - United States

Today, I put my picture into a celebrity look alike website. The three matches that came up were Barbra Streisand, Hillary Clinton, and Boy George. I'm 16. I'm a boy. FML

agreeclassic 54 679

vote type 1 7 316