Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML
raphthesack
Mr Saint Cloud, Fl, United States of America Single
Today, at physical therapy, the girl next to me had a blue armband. I said, "Hey, sweet iPod". She said, "Actually, I have diabetes." FML
Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML
Relieved
Today, a friend posted the Facebook status "Ahhh... relief." Trying to be funny, I replied "Why? Did you just poop?" A few hours later, I read her previous posts and found out her dad's in the hospital having heart surgery. Now everyone thinks I'm a heartless dick. FML
Today, I learned if you dream you're having a piss, you most likely are having a piss. FML