SilentCat

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Guildford, UK
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A propos de Silentcat

Longtime lurker on FML - the laughter helps pass my days at work! I believe in trying to get along with everyone... and that people should use proper grammar and punctuation :P I've watched enough live surgery over the last few years to last me all 9 lives, and enjoy reading DocBastard's blog :)

Silentcat - Followers

Silentcat - Followed

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Fucked!

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Silentcat's favorite FMLs

Wurdz is hard

By Holy Testacles - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression, "Knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as, "Kill yourself." FML

agreeclassic 31 194

vote type 1 7 971

By nullpointer - 03/08/2016 04:38 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I farted so loud that my cat thought that I was growling at him, and bit me in self-defense. FML

agreeclassic 13 826

vote type 1 1 995

By Crawlinginmymemes - 02/10/2016 18:46 - United States - Danvers

Today, I accidentally shut the door on someone who was walking behind me. After he opened the door, I turned, looked him sincerely in the eye and said, "Suffering". I meant to say sorry. FML

agreeclassic 9 984

vote type 1 2 010

Snoopy

By Anonymous - 26/03/2013 00:28 - United Kingdom - London

Today, whilst texting my boyfriend on the train, I noticed the woman sitting next to me staring intently at my phone. After letting my boyfriend know, he sent a message saying, "Are we gonna involve the dog again? Last night was fun." She gasped and screamed that I'm a "twisted dog-humping bitch." FML

agreeclassic 44 618

vote type 1 7 322

By minibuch1505 - 21/09/2012 11:31 - France - Halluin

Today, as I was waiting for my girlfriend in the street, I saw a woman who looked a lot like her. I ran towards her, my arms in the air ready to give her a hug, only to realise it wasn't her. I then had to pass the woman, my arms in the air, still running. FML

agreeclassic 474

vote type 1 111