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By amyhyett - 28/01/2015 23:18 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I walked into a door on my way in to an interview, in front of the interviewer and a group of people waiting to be interviewed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 650

You deserved it 3 420

By Shocked - 17/07/2009 19:24 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I exchanged promise rings. I promised that I would stay committed to him and that he was the only one for me. He promised that he would stop seeing other woman behind my back. He wasn't kidding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 259

You deserved it 5 376

Reading comprehension

By Anonymous - 29/07/2020 08:00

Today, one of my clients called me, saying that he received my email. When I asked what I could do for him, he replied, “Well, what does the email say?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 319

You deserved it 200

Bad start

By Kathryn - 28/10/2021 13:59 - United States

Today, I was getting ready for school and stepped out on my porch to go wait for the bus. I literally said out loud, “Today is gonna be a good day.” I took one step and fell all the way down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 035

You deserved it 196

By dogproblems - 27/01/2015 15:09 - United States - Charlotte

Today, I shaved my beard in preparation for an important work conference. Now my dog won't stop growling and barking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 538

You deserved it 3 570

By joe1234 - 17/07/2009 02:28 - United States

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to put a pretzel on my forehead while I was sleeping on the beach. I now have a pretzel-shaped tan line in the middle of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 870

You deserved it 9 741

Can't show my face there again

By Anonymous - 26/01/2023 19:00

Today, I embarrassed myself not once, not twice, but three times in front of a coworker. I dropped something, they came to help; I got distracted and fell forward onto my knees, to only then nearly knock over an entire skid of boxes on to the both of us. I kinda want to quit my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 659

You deserved it 192

Unloved

By Anonymous - 03/08/2020 08:03

Today, my dad lied and said he was busy working, all because he didn't want to see me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 441

You deserved it 151

Depends on the content of the message…

By Anonymous - 08/06/2024 20:00 - United States - Sandy

Today, I was sexting my ex in a bad choice whirlwind, but I accidentally sent it to the guy I've just met. I immediately knew the message wasn’t meant for him, and that it ruined our chances of dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 853

Stuck with you

By Lance - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my headphones were broken, so I fixed them with Super Glue. Without thinking, I stuck them in my ear and listened to some music. When it came time to take them out, I couldn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 193

You deserved it 54 028

By dani911 - 15/07/2009 01:16 - United States

Today, I noticed a car following me all the way to my house. It was dark so I got really nervous and called the police. The person got out of the car. It was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 724

You deserved it 37 390

Didn't think it through

By Mister_FML - 12/08/2020 08:01

Today, I was at my new store, fixing it up. I was about to leave, so I took my clothes off to let the dirty ones dry, as I had other clothes in my car. I walked to the back of my store and the back door locked. The car was locked. I was in my boxers with no phone and no way to go home for 3 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 810

You deserved it 1 412

Bee in her bonnet

By Anonymous - 12/06/2024 20:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, my wife bumped into my ex-girlfriend from before we met. My wife said that she’s glad she's hotter than her, and we laughed. She has now mentioned this every hour since then, and now insists I list the reasons why she’s hotter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 551

You deserved it 114

You get what you give

By Anonymous - 28/12/2025 22:00

Today, to my horror, I discovered that my husband is cheating on me. My friends and family refuse to support me, stating that, "He cheated on his ex-wife with you, what did you expect?" I honestly thought he was my soulmate and that's why I pursued him. Why can't anyone understand that? FML

I agree, your life sucks 137

You deserved it 1 301

Friends for miles

By mark - 14/06/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, every one of the girls in the friend group I’m in collectively agreed that I'm too soft, innocent, and adorable looking to date or hook up with. However, they expressed that they each want to get with my best friend, and asked me if I can set each of them up with him to hook up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 121

By Mazzam - 19/11/2008 11:33 - France

Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she'd bought for me. I said, joking, "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 306

You deserved it 18 585

By Username - 25/11/2011 16:15 - United States

Today, I woke up to the smell of bacon. It smelled so good, and made me very hungry. Then I realized it was my neighbor cooking. I have no money or bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 281

You deserved it 4 170

By nightput - 17/11/2008 06:02 - France

Today, I took my driving test. I spent 30 minutes with the handbrake on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 452

You deserved it 28 728

Night terrors

By Si123 - 15/08/2020 08:01

Today, after a long day at work, I was ready to wind down for the night. I sat on my bed and turned towards a fluttering on my left. I saw the biggest daddy-longlegs inches from my face, jumped in the other direction, forgetting there was a wall, and hit my head on it. I'm now officially wide awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 270

You deserved it 257

Malding

By ptwm - 25/01/2010 20:10 - United States

Today, while vainly running a comb through my balding hair, I noticed a hair sticking out of my nose. I yanked it out, and the pain made me tear up a little. It was an inch long. I'm 24 and beginning to have more hair in my nose than on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 642

You deserved it 2 960

Running late

By SMV - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - France

Today, my company was having a huge party so I went to work dressed in my best outfit. During lunch break, my boss said to me, "You really missed out on something yesterday, it was great fun!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 275

You deserved it 6 109

Double standards

By Anonymous - 19/08/2020 05:05

Today, my best friend, who is also Godmother to my son, came over to visit for a few hours, as she does every other day. My husband complained to me that she’s over a lot. But he doesn’t see anything wrong with his best friend coming over every weekend and sleepover for 2-3 days straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 604

You deserved it 199

Profile pictures

By Anonymous - 21/06/2024 00:00 - United States - Macon

Today, I went on an online date. I'd spent a while getting ready and making sure I looked good. When I arrived at the café, I saw my date and approached with a smile. He stood up, looked me over, and said, "Oh, I thought you were your profile picture’s friend." Then left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 536

You deserved it 272

By jshibbz0993 - 23/11/2011 15:16 - United States

Today, I was complaining to my boyfriend about our excessive water bill. He then says, "Don't look at me, I don't even shower." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 530

You deserved it 6 103

By jennyygrace - 11/07/2009 00:16 - United States

Today, I was walking through airport security when a guard began making lewd gestures at his crotch, while looking at me. I was outraged until I realized he was trying to tell me that my fly was down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 616

You deserved it 41 673

Spoiler alert

By Anonymous - 01/02/2023 00:00

Today, I spoiled the ending of my favorite show for my friend, so now I'm banned from watching or discussing it with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 153

You deserved it 1 436

Chuds everywhere

By satanworshipper - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Hollywood

Today, I received another death threat for teaching evolution in college. I'm a geology teacher. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 686

You deserved it 2 849

By desertpunk75 - 19/01/2011 03:40 - United States

Today, my friends thought it'd be funny to hold lighters under the smoke alarms while I was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 858

You deserved it 3 173

By Anonymous - 24/01/2010 07:00 - United States

Today, I went down to my grandparents' house to spend some time with them. I was in the guest room when I noticed a box in the corner of the closet labelled "Crap". I opened up the box to see my Dad's John Elway Autographed Football in it. I got it for him for Christmas, it cost me $600. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 882

You deserved it 2 911

Rushed

By nostamp - 10/07/2009 06:20 - United States

Today, I rushed to the post office to mail an important document for the study abroad program that I'd applied for, which was due in a few days. Just as the envelope slipped out of my hand and into the mail box, I caught a glimpse of the upper right corner where there was supposed to be a stamp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 339

You deserved it 39 327

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The Top

Today, I found out my coworker was arrested for beating the crap out of his wife. I gave him a serious pep talk yesterday where I told him to stop taking her shit and start standing up for himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 029

You deserved it 5 171

Today, it's the third day my ring won't come off. I used soap, vegetable oil, lotion, soaked my hand in ice to make the swelling of my finger to come down, and even my mom pulled so hard she dislocated my finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 269

You deserved it 5 871

Today, while making deliveries, a lady answered the door stark naked and invited me in. I'm a young single guy so I went for it, but her husband was also there, ready to go with an enormous boner, so I ran to my van and went back to the depot. They reported me for bad customer service. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 964

You deserved it 2 812

Today, my husband and mother started supplementing my newborn son with formula, because they are such control freaks and don't like my son getting attached to me. He was doing very well while exclusively breastfed according to the doctor. But it looks like my happiness or my son's well-being is of zero importance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 086

You deserved it 177

Today, my husband has been out partying all night. While my in-laws didn't ask him a single question, earlier I received more than six calls from them about when I'll be home to cook and clean. Where was I? In the office for the first time after working from home for past 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 103

You deserved it 119

Today, I tried to sneak some cookies out of the pantry without my dog noticing. I dropped one, and now he thinks that every time I open the pantry, it’s snack time. He won’t stop barking at it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 321

You deserved it 193