Today, our kids left for the weekend so that my wife and I could have some much-needed alone time. We've been fighting a lot recently and really need some time to have fun together. Now it turns out that she doesn't want to be around me because of the fighting. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife screamed, cried, called me lazy and a bad parent, and threatened to leave and take our four kids. All I did was ask for an hour to myself every day for some private time. FML
Today, my wife, who I haven’t seen for over a month because we both travel a lot for work, got home. The last thing she said to me was that she couldn't wait to get home because she just wants some alone time. FML
Today, it was our first kid-free weekend in almost two months, and I was hoping for a nice date night. Instead, she picked up two shifts at work and then had a girls' night. Don't worry, she assigned me a massive deep clean that ate up almost my entire weekend. FML
Today, I've been on vacation with my friend and his family for a week. Apparently, his idea of a vacation includes constant screaming arguments with his wife, while their kids sob in the living room. I tried to take the kids out once and got a lecture on boundaries, which started another huge fight. FML
Today, my wife packed the kids up and left for Idaho. I found a letter saying that she misses her paranoid schizo dad and brother, and that she misses me when I'm at work, but can't stand me when I'm home. She is now 1700 miles away, and I'm here alone. FML
Today, my wife and I both spent a weekend away separately with our close friends. However, we ran into each other, unplanned, at the airport. She was with her girls and I was with my girlfriend. FML
Today, my wife and I had an argument serious enough to end our marriage, while overseas on vacation, with my whole family present. Three more days of awkward tension until we get to fly home and it all ends. FML
Today, after a long talk with the kids, I finally got all the chores around the house done early so we could have a fun family weekend. My wife decided to be a wet blanket and insisted we needed to deep clean the already clean kitchen. Three arguments later, everyone is sulking, and I'm working in the kitchen alone. FML
Today, I found out why my wife has been upset with me for the last week. She told me this morning that I did something to upset her on our date night last Friday, she won't tell me what, and she said she'll leave me if I do it again. FML
Today, my wife and mother of my kids said she doesn't want sex. Or a divorce. FML
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Top comments
alliewillie 22
I could see how if they've been at each other's throats, she might want some time away from him. It never says she wanted/asked kids to leave, so she might not be passive-aggressive. But you know, I was going to click FYL until I saw your name. And if you're willing to call your wife a "****" to tens or hundreds of thousands of people online, you sound like an asshole and maybe she's justified in not wanting to be around you.
amandajlucas2015 2
I thought it was quite rude for OP to call his wife a ****.. Even tho they are fighting he should still have more respect for her than to go call her that nasty name on the Internet for strangers to see
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Comments (109)
saksxalmo 20
I hate when people change their minds like that without warning. >:( And how does she expect anything to change if she just keeps being passive-aggressive?
sincerelyjay 13
The wife probably thinks sticking around with the husband will probably give them more room to argue. Thus, adding more stress.
alliewillie 22
I could see how if they've been at each other's throats, she might want some time away from him. It never says she wanted/asked kids to leave, so she might not be passive-aggressive. But you know, I was going to click FYL until I saw your name. And if you're willing to call your wife a "****" to tens or hundreds of thousands of people online, you sound like an asshole and maybe she's justified in not wanting to be around you.
doctorhook86 25
This FML is hard to call; there's not enough info. Suffice to say, both the OP and his wife probably need to have some serious conversations about how they want to treat each other in the future.
saksxalmo 20
I guess I just assumed the wife had agreed to the plan seeing as the kids were involved... But ouch, I did NOT see the "****" thing. YDI, OP, you sound like an ass.
Angel157 8
You should never call a girl a ****. I'll swear like I sailor sometimes but I just don't call anyone a ****. It's rude and disrespectful
UberNova 18
54- Its just another swear word, like "****" or "****", it is someone's perception of the word that makes them like to think it is worse, when it is just a 4 letter combination. Saying you shouldn't call someone a "****" because it is rude and disrespectful is stupid, the entire point to calling people bad things IS TO BE rude and disrespectful.
PizzaRollsss 5
^ **** isn't such a curse word but I get what you're saying, and I agree.
Drigr 9
When I was first introduced to the word "****" I was told it was an acronym for "can't understand normal thinking" because of that, its a word I've avoided as well. Not sure why it makes a difference to me, but it does
jewelia13 12
69 - Actually, ****'s considered especially degrading to women. It's reducing them to "nothing more of importance than what's between their legs".
bonsaiboy26 1
Show her these comments for real woman have serious effin problems... Sounds bad but I have a hate for them now I've put up with so much of the same. Just prover her wrong.
UberNova 18
94- It is the exact same when calling a man a "dick" or "****". Also, calling someone a "****" is not gender specific, I call males ***** probably more than females (a small example).
FATTY_MCDOOGLE 29
I knew someone who was just like that.
iamsolid 11
You should give each other time..or talk it out. whatever works best.
rhaemese 9
I'm sure OP just wants to sex it out. Sigh. Women these days.
DarkHelmet 10
Catch 22 my friend
ICastillo 25
The naked astronaut bit always works OP, it drives the lady's crazy.
brianandtommy 4
How old are you? Like 15-17 you don't even know what marriage is about
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Well I know being around the same person for years, even just a friend, you'll start to fight over the dumbest shit. I think OP needs to go on a weekend fishing trip with his mates.
iamsolid 11
You're right, I don't fully understand marriage. But, I can tell you that with my parents having been divorced and then remarried, I know first hand how to easily fix a situation. Sorry, didn't know I wasnt allowed to give advice based on personal experiences.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
2- Don't worry about 41. Some people see age instead of maturity. This is a public website and you should feel free to give advice. Just know this is the Internet and you'll be patronized on what you say by every asshole out there.
zebraumicornz 6
Nice name OP
amandajlucas2015 2
I thought it was quite rude for OP to call his wife a ****.. Even tho they are fighting he should still have more respect for her than to go call her that nasty name on the Internet for strangers to see
CuriousAlien 7
That's the same thing I was thinking!
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Not saying I think OP calling his wife a **** is acceptable on any level whatsoever, but I believe over the pond **** isn't as much as a taboo as it is here in the U.S.
jfotogs 0
Did nobody notice OP is from the U.K.?? Saying "****" over there is comparable to saying "meanie" anywhere else - I love how crass the English are
Shrike 24
68, you're an idiot. "****" in the UK is almost as offensive as it is in the US. I think you're confusing stereotypes there. You must be thinking of the one about Australians. Either way, you're an ignorant twat and need to get out more.
teague95 16
What I love about this FML, is that OP is acting like it's just his wife. It take two dipshit.
absolutegrrr 7
**** is probably the most offensive word I know of in England..
arrowintheknee 5
Some people find swear words more offensive than others. For me there all just words and if i think of them as offensive then they will be offensive. To him and maybe to her its a similar feeling. Besides calling her a **** is just him being frustrated with her hes not gonna call her a angel if thier argueing all of the time.
jackipdoc 31
He deserves it for calling his wife a ****. If I found out my boyfriend called me a **** I definitely wouldn't sleep with him for a long time and depending on the circumstances could be a deal breaker. That's pretty disrespectful to say about a loved one. At least I hope you love her.
kingwess 8
Well... It's time for you to change that!
deathtothepix 26
You know who never falls out with you or leaves your side? Your hand.
mikeofthunder 13
I guess that's one of two reasons guys love their hand so much ;)
teresee 8
Wow. #foreveralone
gc327072 31
62 GTFO with your 'trends' you lame twitttertwat!
deathtothepix 26
Well if your favourite hand gets ruined there's always the other twin!
olpally 33
#twitterswag :D thumbs down for being a rebel... Hahaha.
Archay 13
Be assertive and take her to the bedroom anyway but it might not end well
unknown_user5566 27
Please tell me you didn't just suggest that OP should basically molest his wife.
CuriousAlien 7
Oh wow, that must really hurt. I hope you guys REALLY do work things out.
whiteboy896 9
Women....
unknown_user5566 27
I've been stubborn like that with my husband before, and he's been stubborn like that with me. Generally the reasonable one just turns on the charm, and the other one eventually cracks. OP, just be uber sweet to your wife. She'll eventually see that she shouldn't be wasting precious time like that.
Jonah171 12
Errr...judging by your name you don't sound like you really care that much...but you should probably talk to her before things crumble down to nothing.