Today, my fiancé, my two-year-old, and my dog are all sleeping peacefully next to me in our new king-sized memory foam bed. It's 2:15 in the morning. Why am I not sleeping? Because they all snore, one right after the other. It's like an endless song of snoring. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I'm spending the night at my family’s house. I have to share a room with my two kids and their mother. The three of them snore like warthogs in a zoo. Desperate for sleep, I went to go sleep on the couch. The dog sleeping on the rug snores like an old truck. I’m never going to get any sleep. FML
Today, it's 2am. I've been trying to get to sleep for the past two hours next to my snoring boyfriend. Every time I nudge him to shut him up, his body tenses, he farts, then goes straight back to snoring. FML
Today, between my cats scratching every surface they can find, my boyfriend's snoring, and the dog barking at every slight noise outside, I'm unlikely to ever get more than 3 hours of sleep at a time. FML
Today, after barely sleeping all week, I tried some ASMR videos to help me fall asleep. Both my dogs and my husband are out cold, snoring so loud I can't even hear the ASMR. FML
Today, and like every day before it, my boyfriend’s snoring is keeping me up all night. FML
Today, my dogs have coordinated a T-formation as I lay down to sleep. Essentially cutting me off 80% of the bed. Too tired to fight, too annoyed to sleep. FML
Today, my dog won't stop barking at his own shadow, my cat won't stop purring while kneading on me, and my new kitten won't stop squeaking. It's all very cute, but I can't sleep at all. FML
Today, I had to temporarily relocate to my brother's room after mine was being repainted. Not only do I have to sleep on the floor, but I also have to put up with my brother and dog both snoring loudly. What's worse is that they alternate in snoring. Goodbye sleep. FML
Today, after not being able to sleep for two hours because my boyfriend wouldn't stop talking, he fell asleep and I was left wide awake. I listened to him snore for another three hours and only got a couple of hours sleep. He's not working today, but I am. FML
Today, I realized for the last year that my husband has been home from Iraq, I haven't gotten more than a few hours of sleep at night. Not because he gets nightmares, but because he now snores so loud that the pets sleep at the other end of the house to get rest. FML
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Top comments
sparky82 11
Let me snore you the song of my people.
MyDadLeftMeInKFC 21
You sure know how to pick 'em
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Comments (31)
saffy66 34
My solution would be to go get in the child's bed (assuming they didn't wet their own bed) and in the morning, dish out some new rules about who and what sleeps where.
xx000o 27
There's always the couch.
tigeresscrazy 12
You deserve it for letting the dog in the bed lol dogs snoring can drown out almost any other noise but your life dose suck cause even with out the dog you got to deal with hubby an your kid lol I feel for you
tigeresscrazy 12
I'm sorry It was supposed to be a joke unfortunately I keep forgetting I'm not funny
Cynistor 9
Put on some ear plugs, close your eyes, and join the symphony.
Dean__Winchester 16
All I can picture are the seven dwarfs sleeping all in their own tempos. I feel really bad for you, but can't stop laughing at my mental image all the same
Tannasgh 22
In ear headphones and the naturespace app with thunder tracks. 2 pugs, a Boston terrier and a girlfriend who all snore.
OhPuhleeze 23
OMG!! You could take a video of this and memory foam could use it as their advertisement of a comfy bed. You could get paid enough to get a second home. Just make the video and share it with is anyway.
candacewho 4
You could've gone to sleep in the 2 year old's bed, provided that she has a real bed at this point, and not a crib.
kueves87 4
Dude 3 words... Bose quiet comfort. Best headphones in the world
DLBL 23
That sounds like music to my ears.