Today, I had to temporarily relocate to my brother's room after mine was being repainted. Not only do I have to sleep on the floor, but I also have to put up with my brother and dog both snoring loudly. What's worse is that they alternate in snoring. Goodbye sleep. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I'm spending the night at my family’s house. I have to share a room with my two kids and their mother. The three of them snore like warthogs in a zoo. Desperate for sleep, I went to go sleep on the couch. The dog sleeping on the rug snores like an old truck. I’m never going to get any sleep. FML
Today, despite the fact that I live with my parents and pay rent, my mom decided the best spot for my brother, his wife and one-year-old son was my bedroom. So I'm sleeping on the couch, because it would, "take too long to clean her room." FML
Today, my dad and I had to move in with my mom. There's only two tiny rooms, and my aunt lives there along with her dogs and my cat. The dogs have tried to kill my cat, I have to share the bed with my mom, who snores BAD, and I haven't slept in two days. I work early all week. FML
Today, I arrived at the house we rented for my sister's engagement party. I was also told that I have to sleep in the most cramped bedroom with my uncle, who sounds like a mortally wounded warthog when he snores. I paid for the rental. FML
Today, my fiancé, my two-year-old, and my dog are all sleeping peacefully next to me in our new king-sized memory foam bed. It's 2:15 in the morning. Why am I not sleeping? Because they all snore, one right after the other. It's like an endless song of snoring. FML
Today, I have to sleep in another room, with the door closed, because if I don't, my girlfriend's snoring will keep me awake. I was diagnosed with chronic insomnia because of this. FML
Today, I was feeling too tired because I couldn't sleep last night, due to my mother's snoring. Since I stayed with both my parents and my sister in a small town for a vacation, I requested to sleep in separate rooms because my mother's snoring is disgustingly loud. She refused, and called me a crybaby. FML
Today, I couldn't sleep because I had the worst time positioning myself around my cat who was sleeping in my bed. I couldn't kick my cat out of bed because I earlier today had an argument with my brother over which of us the cat loved more. FML
Today, I'm stuck with sleeping in the same room as my mother. The problem? Her snores are extremely loud and a full minute long. I'm not kidding, I timed it. FML
Today, my roommate's dogs dictate where I sleep. When my roommate doesn't work, I get to stay in my bedroom. When he does work, I have to go into the living room because they will bark at me simply because I exist until he comes back. I'm already an insomniac; loud dogs are a little overkill. FML
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Top comments
Glowworm56 27
This reminds me of a joke. A woman has been having trouble sleeping lately because her dog snores. In desperation, she calls her vet. He recommends that she tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles and he'll stop snoring. That night, when the dog begins to snore, she takes a red ribbon and ties it around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the snoring stops. Her husband stumbles in later that night drunk and starts to snore once he gets to bed. She wonders if the trick will work on him so she takes a blue ribbon and does the same thing she did to the dog. It works and she has a peaceful night. The next morning, she heads off to work. Her husband wakes up and notices the ribbons tied around both him and his dog's testicles. He looks at the dog and remarks "I have no idea where we were last night, but we won first and second place."
MrsBugi 21
Sleep on the living room couch? You may get more sleep that way..
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Comments (16)
MrsBugi 21
Sleep on the living room couch? You may get more sleep that way..
RichardPencil 32
Sleep during the day while your brother is up and out of the room. Or, earplugs
Colon_Man 17
How big is your room? I recently painted my whole house. You start a bedroom in the morning, it's dry by afternoon.
Yudith 28
Maybe they painted in the evening because they were working during the day. It would still be more confortable to sleep in the bathtub than in the dog's room.
Colon_Man 17
Paint on a Saturday, then. No one's holding them to a schedule - unless they're painting to sell the house.
Inkoseh 33
Do you not own a couch? Have a living room or any other room you could sleep in; floor or furniture wise? And to others, yes paint can be dry by the afternoon, but depending on what you purchase, those fumes can take a few days to disappear. Sleeping in a freshly painted room can stink, literally.
Talented73 54
At least they don't snore from both ends.
Glowworm56 27
This reminds me of a joke. A woman has been having trouble sleeping lately because her dog snores. In desperation, she calls her vet. He recommends that she tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles and he'll stop snoring. That night, when the dog begins to snore, she takes a red ribbon and ties it around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the snoring stops. Her husband stumbles in later that night drunk and starts to snore once he gets to bed. She wonders if the trick will work on him so she takes a blue ribbon and does the same thing she did to the dog. It works and she has a peaceful night. The next morning, she heads off to work. Her husband wakes up and notices the ribbons tied around both him and his dog's testicles. He looks at the dog and remarks "I have no idea where we were last night, but we won first and second place."
DraconicFeline 31
...I really thought the punchline was going to be more interesting than that.
Glowworm56 27
There's a second version of this joke with the same punchline except that it revolves around two women coming upon a drunken Scotsman passed out on the sidewalk. They are both curious to know whether a Scotsman wears briefs under his kilt or goes commando, so they have a peek under his skirt. Please with the answer, one of them rewards the Scotsman by placing a blue ribbon upon his ******** and walk on. The Scotsman later on wakes up and notices the ribbon. "Well Laddie, I don't know where you've been last night, but you've won first prize!"
timonedogdead 16
Earplugs
UOFreak07 8
It shouldn't take long to repaint your room. Couple days???
Rebecca Stockert 16
sleeping in a room filled with paint fumes kills brain cells and seeing as how they are endangered world wide they should be protected at all cost... little bit of discomfort now but much appreciated
blobbertthethird 24
My husband and dog take turns, too. Living next to a high-use train track would be more restful.