Today, I went into my dad’s phone out of suspicion and read his texts. Instant regret. He’s 65, goes to various prostitutes, mum’s oblivious, they’re happy and take care of each other. This one’s a weird one to suppress or learn to let go. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out my dad has been sending dirty text messages to my mom. Which wouldn't be a problem except they're divorced and my dad is remarried. FML
Today, I went through my boyfriend's old phone to get over a gut feeling I've been having that things aren't as good as they seem. Turns out he's been taking videos of himself masturbating and sending the videos to chicks on WhatsApp, and contacting an old neighbor trying to hook up with her. FML
Today, I found my dad's porn stash on his laptop. I went through it for a laugh to see what kind of sick, twisted shit he's into. Mostly nude pictures of my mum, as it turns out. I can't wipe the afterimage from my mind. FML
Today, I found out my happily married father has been hiring escorts on-line for 3 years. FML
Today, my dad had gotten a new cell phone. So I started to mess around with the cool features on his phone and stumbled upon some pictures he had taken. Next thing I know I'm looking at my mom going down on my dad. FML
Today, my husband left his cellphone unlocked so I decided to go through it. I found 10 texts threads from 10 different women, one of them from my 18 year old sister who was sending him nude pictures. FML
Today, as I was driving my dad home, I got a text message. My dad, who doesn't want me texting while I'm driving, decided to read the text message to me. He began to repeat a message from my boyfriend recounting the amazing sex we had the night before. FML
Today, my dad came round to the house. Looking rather pleased with himself he pulled out his phone, grinned, and chucked it over to me. I glanced at the screen to see a naked woman. He smiled and said "I tapped that last night". FML
Today, I was going through my sibling’s old phones from high school, trying to find pictures of our deceased father. It turns out that all my girlfriends had sent my brother nudes at one point or another. FML
Today, I had a look through my dad's girlfriend's phone she left on the table. Best part: I now know what I'm getting for Christmas. Worst part: I now know my dad's favourite position. FML
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Top comments
Tee Wallisaurusrex 13
I mean... are you SURE she doesn't know? when I hit an age where I cbf boning my husband I'll be outsourcing that to a pro.
dreams2383 20
no one is owed inheritance. you didn't earn it. someone can do whatever the hell they want with their money they earned. it's not yours.
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Comments (4)
Tee Wallisaurusrex 13
I mean... are you SURE she doesn't know? when I hit an age where I cbf boning my husband I'll be outsourcing that to a pro.
RichardPencil 32
The ****** are ******* you out of your inheritance and sucking off any wealthy you should be coming into!
dreams2383 20
no one is owed inheritance. you didn't earn it. someone can do whatever the hell they want with their money they earned. it's not yours.
Charlie Given 28
It's called sarcasm 🤦♂️ and Mr. Pencil is famous for it on this site and has been since the beginning!!! So get used to it 🤣 you'll know if he's being serious because he's giving good advice, otherwise he's just being sarcastically funny.
RichardPencil 32
You can't spend your money on illegal activities.
poopface82 25
I have to ask, what was your end game here? Do you really want to break up something that works? And what if he wasn’t? Then you’re a snooping asshole trying to find dirt on your innocent father. And if he was, well, this. You can’t win.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
I've heard of couples going through each others' phones, but going through a parent's phone? Why?