Today, I talked to my boyfriend's dad for the first time. One of the first things that he said to me was, "So, I hear you're a screamer." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first thing he said to him was, "You're an idiot for dating my daughter." FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Son, I want you to suck upon my nipples of knowledge." FML
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML
Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML
Today, I met my new girlfriend's teenage son for the first time. His first words were, "So you're the guy who has been banging my mom." The rest of the evening he kept asking what we have done and if his mom was good at it. She thought it was awfully funny to hear me tell her son how she was in bed. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I thought everything went well, until I got a text from him later saying, "Come on mom, she isn't THAT bad." FML
Today, I introduced my boyfriend of two weeks to my parents. My dad asked me to leave the room so they could have some "guy talk". I eavesdropped, only to hear the words "sex-crazed fuck" and a threat to stick bamboo shoots under my boyfriend's fingernails if he ever hurt me. FML
Today, I had to have an awkward conversation with my parents when they told me they were able to hear me and my boyfriend having sex at night. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
InuYasha17 0
Awkward... o_o
Chunchunchun 3
Need to chew your boyfriend out for that...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (130)
scenekid1119 0
I would reply with "I heard your a min man"
scenekid1119 0
I would have replied with "I heard your a min man"
sallen0046 4
You're sleeping with a guy whose family you haven't even met yet. Chances are the guy didn't think you'd be around long enough for it to matter what he told his father. If you don't want things like this to happen, don't have sex with men you haven't know long enough to be able determine what they'll find appropriate to share.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Discounting the entire relationship because the OP hasn't met one parent is a bit of a reach, since the dad could easily live far away. If that's the case, it would be difficult to learn that her boyfriend and his father have an unusually candid relationship without eavesdropping on phone conversations, which is rude. Just a guess, here, but do you wear a lot of brown and/or grey, sallen? O.o
JohnnyK716 0
lol that's all I have to say. that's funny
Misguided_Ghost 0
PAHAHAHAHAH! [=
Klozna 0
Squirting and Screaming go together like Root Beer and Ice Cream! Also very delicious!
boredoutofwits 0
A) It's completely inappropriate that your boyfriend's dad would comment about that B) Now you know your boyfriend has a big blabbermouth C) You probably only scream because he's so bad you have to make epic fakes So, what are you waiting for? Dump him.
RitaMix 0
AMEN!!!! He needs to respect your intimate times together as private between the two of you, OP. And his dad was WAY inappropriate bringing it up to you, even if your bf can't respect the bounds of privacy in an intimate relationship. I would have looked pointedly at the bf and said, "Not anymore I don't!" And walked out on his dumb ass. FYL, dear. You deserve someone who will respect you and what you have together.
DJRRMS94 0
lol.....ouch :(
jem12 0
oh wow..akward Moment.
alexarose 0
I just don't get how people of those relationships can say that . I mean you have to be pretty retarded.