Today, it was my 21st birthday. I had a simple party with my boyfriend, with just a cake and a bottle of red wine. My boyfriend managed to get so drunk that he danced naked for 10 minutes, then told me I'm hideously obese but that he loves me anyway. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it was my boyfriend's 21st birthday. Along with a pair of $80 shoes, I bought him a birthday cake, his favorite ice cream and a $15 balloon. I showed up to the party and he was very intoxicated. So intoxicated that he pops the balloon, drops the cake, and throws up all over his new shoes. FML
Today, It was my fiancé's 21st birthday party. It ended with him too drunk to walk and wailing about how much he misses an ex girlfriend of his that he dumped 4 years ago. FML
Today, my boyfriend turned 21 and got drunk at a bar. Being sober, I went through the whole ordeal: calling a cab, carrying him up three flights of stairs, helping him by the toilet, and taking him to bed. Just when I'm about to sleep, he gets up, pushes his shorts down, and pees on me. Twice. FML
Today, it's my twenty first birthday. My biggest birthday surprise was discovering that I'm alcohol intolerant, by vomiting my first beer all over my boyfriend's mother. FML
Today, it was my 21st birthday and I invited a handful of my best friends over. They all stood me up and I drank alone in my apartment. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, I threw a birthday party for my boyfriend. As a joke, my friend and I served him non-alcoholic beer to see how he'd react. After a while, he faked being drunk, using it as an excuse after I caught him making out with one of my so-called "friends". FML
Today, it's my 20th birthday! Happy birthday to me! My boyfriend threw a beer can through my back wind-shield after breaking up with me. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend told me he was too busy studying for finals, but that he'd take me out another day instead. He later drunk-dialled me from a party demanding a lift back home. FML
Today, I had woken up very excited to celebrate my 21st birthday. I rolled over in bed and asked my boyfriend if we could go out to the park to have a picnic, considering the lovely weather. He looked up at me and said, "You wish I loved you that much." He rolled back over and slept until 3pm. FML
Today, it's my 21st birthday. All my friends showed up at my house already drunk, so I had to be the designated driver. FML
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Top comments
EllOfficial 6
are you hideously obese?
Morgansayshi 0
Was the cake good at least?
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Comments (129)
Jirobub 0
At least he still loves you!
purplemnm 9
that is sexy snuggie, dude.
purplemnm 9
drunken minds speak sober hearts.
Wolpy 9
look, if you're fat you can either be sad and cry about it or start a diet and exercise. Your boyfriend loves you anyway, so I don't see the FML here. You being fat is a fact, not something you're boyfriend decided.
funzcpl 0
and he danced naked for her! your right no fml here
lilluvowl 0
YDI for not taking care of ur body
AthinaMarie 0
she deserved her boyfriend sayin that to her. you are a complete douche darlin.
allmidnighteyes 11
A bottle of red wine? What a lightweight.
sourgirl101 29
Wine gets you messed up quick! and stays in your blood stream for along time. That's why bums are called winos. It's the cheapest way to stay drunk the longest.
allmidnighteyes 11
211 Steel Reserve and Four Loko beg to differ...
cruzer6510 0
what an ass ... I don't care what you look like.. cause no deserves that.
cabinboyy_fml 0
1 chubby chubby...... 2 chubby chubby....... Rhys you doin sit ups :)
cabinboyy_fml 0
* that's sorry dang itouch
awesomesauce8 0
happy birthday!!!!
_staariel5 0
at least he loves you(: thats what matters :D
FMLephant 2
exactly, love isn't about dress size
madasmercury 0
you had a bottle of red wine between 2 people, and he got drunk enough to do that? sheesh.