Today, the girl I went on an awkward date with two weeks ago showed up at university and started smashing my car with a bat. She then broke down in tears and alternated between declaring her love, and cussing me out for "cheating" on her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was on a first date with this girl I've been talking to. I met her and she came with me so I could park my car in the student lot. On the way back, I saw a beat up car with its window duct taped up and exclaimed "Haha! Look at that piece of junk." It was her car. FML
Today, my psycho ex crashed a date with my girlfriend. She acted like we were still together and made a big show of dumping me for cheating on her. My actual girlfriend bought it hook line and sinker. Now I'm single again. FML
Today, I went on a date with a girl that I really like. I picked her up from her house, and as I was pulling out of her driveway, I hit her dad's BMW, knocking off the bumper. FML
Today, I confessed to my girlfriend that I cheated on her. She told me that she needed time to think, and left. An hour later, her dad came by with a baseball bat. FML
Today, I broke up with my psycho girlfriend of one month. She actually expected me to let her keep the vintage car that I've been rebuilding for the past two years, and when I refused, she threatened to burn my garage down with us still in it. FML
Today, I went on a date with the girl of my dreams. Her boyfriend, who she said she'd broken up with, was at the same restaurant with another girl. She screamed at him for ten minutes, then they started making out, and left together. The girl he was with looked at me and said "Eww", then went to hit on another guy. FML
Today, I went on a date with a girl I like. Afterwards, I drove her home, and we just sat there awkwardly. I thought she wanted to kiss me but was nervous, so I jokingly said, "What're you waiting for? Christmas?" I guess she took that as a "Get the hell out", because she broke into tears and left. FML
Today, at age 27, I went to pick up the girl I like for my first ever date. Her brother answered the door with a baseball bat, said the date was off and threatened to smash my kneecaps to pieces if I ever came back. FML
Today, I asked a girl out and made plans to go see a movie. About 5 minutes in, I made a move to put my arm around her and smashed her in the face. FML
Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when a girl came out of nowhere, screaming at me for cheating on her, and saying she was dumping me. I've never seen her before, and she was almost grinning during her little act, but my girlfriend believed it, and I'm now single. FML
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Top comments
SweetAsHell 9
You may not know it, but you two have been going out for years. It's just that most of the time, on your dates, she's hiding in the bushes.
Corrupt_waffles 13
Well now you know why it would have been bad had you actually started consistently dating her. :/
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Comments (132)
Corrupt_waffles 13
Well now you know why it would have been bad had you actually started consistently dating her. :/
mystashisgone 6
Love the reference to another fml. Works perfectly
yassminza 0
#9 that was perfect.
rarrar321 3
Oh, the Aussies :)
ashlieelizabeth 6
#9 What a great reference. Haha :)
walmartpaysme 15
Seriously, if you like a comment just thumbs up. Don't waste valuable comment space parroting the person in front of you.
Harpy20 24
Now that you know, please don't give crazy a baby.
MDTeddy 13
She or her parents has to pay for your car. I'd go ahead and make it happen.
Futacy 30
Bitches be crazy!
jillybee101 7
Sue her.
gc327072 31
If she's a crazy B, it's cause she wants the D. Hehe
fury1031 10
OP, get that bitch arrested!
SweetAsHell 9
You may not know it, but you two have been going out for years. It's just that most of the time, on your dates, she's hiding in the bushes.
cynide 13
#2 Sounds like a keeper! ;D
IscoreOnU 19
Mannnn bitches be trippin!
SCUBA_Diiver 3
What a phsyco bitch!
whosindahouse 9
39- with a bat!
IscoreOnU 19
Ahh 60 I got that reference
oicu812xD 16
Tech n9ne win
gc327072 31
Crazygirlfriend.jpg
GlobalGenocide 8
Haha! time to ring triple 000 and suggest she see's a shrink(after the police arrive or she'll start swinging at you).
rarrar321 3
Triple AAA?
seasonedtoast 19
Triple 0. Australian emergency number.
Drigr 9
Tripple 000 and AAA? So ring up 000000000 and AAAAAAAAA?
nerobluerose 10
Your picture goes with the AAA part
bizarre_ftw 22
Well? Did you cheat? Also, call the cops and get her forcibly medicated
boofgall 16
He just went on an 'awkward' date with her, I'd say there's no solid commitment there to cheat on her.
mystashisgone 6
Maybe I'm weird but unless he asked her out one "date" doesn't mean they are "dating"...but what do I know.
rarrar321 3
Not gonna lie, #4, your picture is exactly the kinda girl I pictured for being the cray cray....no offense.
wolfhausen 7
Hahaha .. That's mean. But hilarious
deadxwedding84 5
Seriously, go hit HER car with a baseball bat.
Khariau 8
Two wrongs don't make a right !
off_constantly 8
17 - pointless but very true
Osito2011 9
Or you can lpoop on her door step everynight. Pray that she and her family gets the point and move far far away.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
IPoop? Is that a toilet with a touch screen?
hopsinlove17 26
#5, because that's mature-_- there are better ways to handle a situation like this
ForS3ri0usn3ss 0
Some girls are just "bat" crazy... Get it? But seriously... Hope you reported her because she clearly needs help
COOL__Coal 12
I don't get it can you explain it?
sonicgreg 12
Get it? No? Well its because she hit his car with a... Oh you do get it? Pretty funny eh? No?
xiaodoggiie 5
Well it is a good thing you aren't dating her.
srgspartan117 8
Right imagine what happened if they dated..... Bat and and a car still meet together most likely earlier hahaha
PleadingInsanity 20
I wonder what made the date awkward. Then again I can only imagine how that went considering the way she acted.
notjustanybody20 9
Bitches be crazy! :D. Maybe you gave off wrong signs at the date.. That led her to beleive that you were enjoying her company?! No? Then she is plain crazy! Runnnnn
TheEpicMilkMan 13
RUN BITCH RUUUNNNNN
aaalllliiiii 6
Hey how do I hit you up? (i know what it means just can't find a button to message you) I'm from sydney
jbones24 22
STAGE 5 CLINGER. ABORT! ABORT!