Today, while in a public restroom I could hear a guy having his way with his hand. He was quoting verses from the Bible. I was in a cubicle and he was at the urinal. I was too frightened to leave. This went on for a very long time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was taking a dump in a public restroom. Minding my own business, I heard somebody go into an adjacent stall. It was dead silent and I don't think he knew I was in there. I thought I heard him scratching his arm or something. I was wrong. He was jacking off. I had to listen to it all. FML
Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML
Today, I was in a stall in a public restroom. Someone came in and started using one of the urinals. Somehow, before I knew it, I found I had just loudly whispered, "SOMEbody's taking a piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiss." FML
Today, I was in a bathroom stall peeing. Shortly after, I heard a couple enter the bathroom, both extremely drunk. They then had sex standing up against the stall I was in, blocking my only exit. I had to sit, wait, and listen as both parties finished. FML
Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper and pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, and ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML
Today, I heard a man pleasuring himself in the stall next to me during my post lunch deuce. I was washing my hands when my boss walked out of the stall. I can no longer look at him in the face. FML
Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying, "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML
Today, I walked into the bathroom at work, and in the stall next to me I could hear someone pleasuring himself. I decided to let my boss know what was going on, but it turns out that it was my boss in the stall next to me. FML
Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML
Today, I used a public toilet. After I did my business in the stall and walked out, I was confronted by the sight of a man standing on tip-toes, holding his penis up to the automatic hand-dryer. Doubt I'll get that image out of my head any time soon. FML
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Top comments
Doortje 30
You should've said, with a hollow voice, "God sees everything, son".
krushr 3
Brings a whole new meaning to "holy crap."
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Comments (100)
sallen0046 4
You were frightened? Of what, exactly? It's none of your business what other people do in the bathroom. God forbid you have to do something logical like leave when you can hang around for an extended period of time and then post it on the internet.
RedPillSucks 33
He was scared of being raped when he stepped out. Anyone who can ********** in a urinal might be capable of other things as well.
Bsane 0
lol my goodness
foryoublue94 0
I think it's kind of not a choice anymore whether or not it's your business when they're masturbating in the urinal of a PUBLIC restroom.
GotALife 11
That's just weird
GotALife 11
Man:Dont commit fornacation Woman:WTF? Man:I will not malest anyone Woman:(Silent) Man:oooooooo Man:Adultoooooo (banging sounds) get it get it get it ya ya ya Woman:(Eye's wide open) Man:Wow....nice pep talk
rattusrattus 19
*terror*
Calyx_fml 22
The bible is ****.
BlackHoleSuns 0
You sir, are very ignorant. Even if this was a joke, which I doubt it was, you fail at being funny and look like a douche. I'm surprised that nobody has called you out on this one yet. If you believe that the Bible is **** then what do you worship? Pornhub?
marmlr339 14
um, is it common anywhere?
auren15 9
I'd join him
Alleged_Cranium 7
He musta been a priest.
Iknoweverything 29
To everyone who said that he must be a religious nut, here's a thought... maybe the guy hated someone for forcing Christianity on him. Therefore, he masterbates to bible verses as a way to be disrespectful. Thinking of the bible while having his way could make him a "dirty dirty boy." It can go both ways though.
maxtheman 0
you shoulda joined him and see who could last longer