Today, my dry spell reached the 15-year mark. I've been employed and in shape the whole time, and now I can feel my body wearing out. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my 3-year-long dry spell was about to end. A lovely lady over for dinner, good food, wine and lots of laughs. Things heated up nicely in the bedroom when a playful wrestle made my bed shift, snapping two of its legs. The bed collapsed, totally ruining the mood. The dry spell continues. FML
Today, it's been twelve years, seven months, and fifteen days since my wife has wanted sex. She was drunk. She no longer drinks. Guess my name is Job now and I have to be patient. FML
Today, I finally had sex with my live-in boyfriend after a long dry spell. It was passionate and great, until I hurt my back changing positions. Now he refuses to touch me, going as far as sleeping on the couch to give me "enough space". Hello new dry spell. FML
Today, after a 6 month dry spell, my husband was yet again “too tired” to have sex. I guess I finally found something I miss about my ex. FML
Today, my husband finally broke our two-month dry spell. I don't know what's more depressing: the fact that it had been two months or that he's horrible at sex. FML
Today, it's our ten-year anniversary, and I thought finally we would break our 10-month dry spell with some action. My husband had dozed off and was snoring even before I could reach the bed after finishing my chores. So much for happily ever after… FML
Today, I haven't had sex for so long that my condoms have gone off. FML
Today, my wife decided to end our dry spell of four months and started dry humping and kissing me in bed. Things were going well until she orgasmed from the activity and declared that she was too tired to do any more, rolled over, and fell asleep. Five months or bust. FML
Today, more than fifteen years of marriage and sex at least once a week has given my otherwise lovely husband the stamina to last a minute and a half. We've cum together less than five times. FML
Today, after 5 years of no intimate, sexual contact with a woman, I finally got my chance. Unfortunately, I also discovered that I have full-on erectile dysfunction. I'm 23 years old. FML
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Top comments
Marcella1016 32
Lmao ok that last part made me laugh and almost choke on my sandwich 😂😂
RichardPencil 32
Hookers? It's such a curse that unattractive people desire attractive ones and can't be happy with those who are in their league. If you could be attracted to your fellow uggos, you'd be getting laid all the time. Otherwise, become attractive by adding cash to the transaction.
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Comments (4)
RichardPencil 32
Hookers? It's such a curse that unattractive people desire attractive ones and can't be happy with those who are in their league. If you could be attracted to your fellow uggos, you'd be getting laid all the time. Otherwise, become attractive by adding cash to the transaction.
Marcella1016 32
Lmao ok that last part made me laugh and almost choke on my sandwich 😂😂
Jonkbaby 23
How are you in social situations? I'm okay, but being yourself and opening up in social situations won't necessarily open the floodgates, but it will help you my friend
metroido 21
this scares me. i absolutely HATE sex, do you have to have it to be healthy????
D J's MOM 17
maybe you're trying too hard, that's a major turn off