Today, I had to slowly explain to my brother that spooning has nothing to do with using a spoon to clean out a woman's vagina after sex. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to explain to my brother why it's not OK to stick his knob in the toaster. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML
Today, I had to explain to my little brother that my tampons weren't ear plugs. FML
Today, I had to explain to my incredibly sheltered 15-year-old brother that no, you don't wear condoms on your balls, and that they don't work by squeezing your balls so the sperm are blocked from coming out when you ejaculate. FML
Today, I had to explain to my fiancé that having me watch him jerk off over a porno is not in fact considered foreplay. FML
Today, I had to explain to my brother why he can't go on dates with my new boyfriend and me. FML
Today, I discovered my brother likes to use our kitchen utensils to scratch his private areas. FML
Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that me switching to "super" sized tampons does not mean I've been having sex with other men with bigger penises, and that my vagina hasn't been "stretched bigger". FML
Today, I realized that the "toothpaste" that I'm always cleaning out with my hands from the sink drain is actually my little brother's semen. FML
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Top comments
coklara 15
Better now then later...or else his girlfriend would be really disappointed.
cutycat136 28
Where would he have even gotten the idea that that's what it was?
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Comments (97)
kiaora_fml 11
Something tells me that your brother has been visiting the weird side of internet ****.....
ThuNDeY 23
Don't correct him XD
DFMLharsh 20
She had to explain this to her brother. This makes it all the more worse... ?
Silk_Routes 14
Megalol...what makes him think like that?
OfficialEarth 12
"You want to spoon? Okay, just let me go to the kitchen.."
hol2eaa 3
troll bother confirmed
fpants2010 18
Better that he knows too little, rather than too much :)
rickyblair 16
And now I have heard everything.
jmagd781 16
I really hope that want after you two did something that would require an explanation for spooning
superspooky 13
Yeah, I hope he understands that eating utensils do not belong anywhere near a ****** ever now.