Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while lifeguarding, a kid thought it'd be hilarious to take a crap in the pool. The other kids freaked out and rushed to get out. Several of them slipped on the way out and hurt themselves fairly badly. Two parents are now threatening to sue us, and my boss blames me. FML
Today, I was lifeguarding a pool party for a bunch of eight year-olds. One of them decided it'd be funny to have a contest to see who could make the most bubbles with their farts. It led to three kids shitting themselves in the pool, and me having the dubious honor of cleaning it up. FML
Today, some kid decided to pee in the kids' play area at work. Because I was the shortest employee working at the time, I got to climb through the area to mop it up, while all the kids pointed and laughed at me. FML
Today, whilst at my job as a lifeguard, a small child decided he couldn't hold it any longer and released his bowels in the pool. It was my job to clean up his dump, including the floating pieces of sweetcorn. FML
Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML
Today, I was at work, and was told to clean up the urine that a child had left down the slide inside the play place. While in the slide, another little kid peed on my head. FML
Today, I was working as a swim instructor for kids. Teaching them not to be afraid of the water, I put my face in the water and blew bubbles. I asked them to try it. All of them did, except for one. I went right to him and blew bubbles again. He then said to me, "But I just peed in that water." FML
Today, I was working my lifeguard job when I had to remind a 17 year-old boy that water is clear and that I could see him pulling his trunks down to moon his friends. Kind of want to drown myself now. FML
Today, I was at the pool with two boys I babysit. The eldest wouldn't get out of the pool so I pretended to call his dad. He then ran out of the pool, pushed me down, grabbed my phone, chucked it into the pool and then ran back into the pool. FML
Today, I took my class to swimming lessons at the local public pool. One student came out and proudly told me that she'd pooed in the shower, but it was OK because she'd then picked it up and flushed it down the toilet. FML
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Top comments
Bano360 25
Main reason I do not want to have kids. 4 siblings is enough.
sleepwalker13 25
Kids these days have no manners
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Comments (69)
josh8215 21
Sounds like Urine a crappy line of work. Quit that shit hole, and find somewhere that you're more appreciated.
SDMiami 7
that's my dream...I would happily let him pee on me.
XSeraphinX 18
Looks like every comment that doesn't say accidents happen or not blame the child/shitty parenting is disliked. Educations seems to be lacking in this 'future generation' and is getting worse.
missemixox 9
Where the **** were the parents? If they're that immature then they should have their mommies and daddies with them 24/7.
goose12321 11
I doubt they would've done anything anyways. The way that this kid behaves leads me to believe that they're just another pair of ignorant parents who don't believe in disciplining their children and let them run rampant.
saxybandgeek 14
That's horrible.. I'm a lifeguard too and one time some little kid walked to the end of the ramp, pulled down his shorts, and peed into the water
bryfer 2
Yell "This is Sparta" and kick the stupid kid into the pool
zazzi01 10
I would've shoved his lil ass
JessicaZado 11
Don't kids just do the darnest things
doodlecloud 27
Well I hope you escorted him out and possibly banned him for the foreseeable future. Maybe even threatened to call the police seeing as public urination is a crime (or it is over here anyway). I doubt they'd do anything but I bet it would give him a good scare. Little shit needs to learn some manners.
Lillith_fml 5
Now, I don't want to be picky or anything, but the sentence makes it sound like the kid was working as a lifeguard. Just saying ;)