Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after I unfortunately woke up too early and too quietly at my new-ish boyfriend's place (we've been together for about a month), I walked into his bathroom to discover that he's one of those freaks who drinks his own piss every morning. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend sleep over at my house for the first time. Upon arriving, he tossed his stuff on the floor and said "I gotta take a piss, where's your shower?" FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend told me that he was going to pee on me to "mark his territory." When I told him that it was disgusting, he said, "last time, I just peed on you in the shower." FML
Today, I thought my boyfriend wanted to be romantic by pouring a bath, getting in then calling me in. As I get comfortable, he stands up and gets out. At the same time, I notice yellow water. He'd pissed in the tub for a joke. FML
Today, I was peeing at a urinal, when the man next to me finished up and shook his penis. I got splashed. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to show off one of his favorite skills: Peeing on my ceiling. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she took the shower head and started spraying my penis with it. I asked her, "What are you doing?" Her response, "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML
Today, my boyfriend started freaking out about how his penis floats in water. Baths with him will never be the same again. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend pees in the shower. This would've been OK if he was peeing into the drain. Instead, he pees on the shampoo and soap bottles. FML
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Top comments
Comet_Candy 23
That is just disgusting...
Heather645 5
Wow, and your still with him?
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Comments (260)
puplintain 4
Who would admit that their boyfriend pissed on their face? Only the product of the most narcissistic generation yet.
savythesavage 4
Lol! What a ******* weirdo!
WhatWhatInTheBut_fml 5
is your boyfriend R. Kelly?
MuseFan1991 14
i swear im the only girl here who finds this fml funny :/ it would be disgusting if they werent in the shower, but it could only have touched her face for a second. people need to lighten up (bracing myself for all the thumbs down)
UltimateGIRness 16
I agree. It's not like they are somewhere far away from water. I may be the only other girl that finds this funny
DAHONKEY 0
I think this is funny also, its pee its not like it wont come off.
MuseFan1991 14
#184 thanks for copying my comment there ¬¬
Nudi_fml 13
"This is only the beginning", so that would mean you accept it? YDI then.
Stupend0us 7
Next time tell him you think you have hemorrhoids and ask him to take a close look. Shit in his face next. Then move out.
missathegirlwond 19
At least you were already in the shower?
sfinsl 3
Wow move out!!!!
Calyx_fml 22
Total disrespect (unless you're into that sort of thing). At least he gives a squirt of piss about you.
killaKT 2
Do you have a 6 or 12 month lease