Today, I handed out 30 resumes only to find out, after the last resume was handed out, my brother had changed the last sentence of every paragraph to 'I am a massive douche bag.' FML

Today, I applied online for a position and typed, "OH&S Certificate." It autocorrected to, "OH&SHIT Certificate." I didn't notice until the site e-mailed me a copy of my completed application. They'd already received it. FML

Just a prank, bro

Today, I had a job interview. I was feeling upbeat and confident I was gonna get the position, until I saw that my main qualification on my resume was being a "real n**ga" and "getting bitches and hoes 24/7." My brother had changed it as a prank. FML

Today, I e-mailed an employer to ask about a job I had applied for earlier. The employer in question was on vacation. The person who replied had the position which I had applied for mentioned in their signature. FML

Today, I logged on to my Gmail account and to find that my brother had sent my math teacher a picture of Bigfoot peeing into a urinal. Using my account. FML

Today, I found out my little brother is a highly committed Nazi. He goes to meetings and everything, my parents think it's great he is "getting out and developing a social life." FML

Today, I realized I had misspelled "Education" on all the resumes I've been submitting. FML

Red flag

Today, I just discovered that the guy I really like, whom I greet with a wave and a sweet "Hi!" to everyday, wasn't really greeting me back with a "Hi!" and a wave. It was a "Heil Hitler!" with a Nazi salute. FML

Today, my job application got denied once again. I looked over it, and saw that my roommate added "screwing over customers" and "hiding dead bodies" under my skills. FML

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML