Today, while lifeguarding over children at work, I started thinking about my girlfriend and got a hard on. Before I realized it, I saved a kid and then hopped out of the pool next to a 5 year old in front of my managers and a little over 50 patrons with a raging boner. My HR meeting is tomorrow. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at work lifeguarding and saw a kid drowning on the far end of the pool. I decided running would be the quickest way to get to her, but as I ran across the pool deck I slipped and hit my head. The kid's mother jumped in to save her child and then called an ambulance for me. FML
Today, after jumping into a public swimming pool, the female lifeguard, who I have had a crush on for years whistled at me. When I got out of the water, she handed me the bathing suit I'd apparently lost. FML
Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML
Today, I was working my lifeguard job when I had to remind a 17 year-old boy that water is clear and that I could see him pulling his trunks down to moon his friends. Kind of want to drown myself now. FML
Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, someone at my workplace yelled at me and filed a complaint for staring at them too often. I'm a lifeguard. FML
Today, I fell asleep while lifeguarding, thinking I could get away with it due to my sunglasses. When I woke up, I saw my boss waving at me. Apparently she'd been trying to get my attention for five minutes. FML
Today, while working my job as a swim instructor, my coworker sprayed me with the hose. I instinctively held up what I was holding to block the cold water. I was holding a 4 year-old. FML
Today, I was forced to get up in front of ten swim teams, including my own, and a hundred spectators to swim 100 yards with an obvious boner sticking out of my suit. FML
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Top comments
ryannmichael 17
That's a hard situation to be in... sorry OP
random2212 16
Omg that's terrible!
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Comments (77)
UncleCaitlyn 21
Don't be so hard on yourself
RedPillSucks 33
he wasn't being hardon himself, he was being hard on the kids :-/
QuaDECH 13
k
ChristinePi 36
They were young once hopefully they won't hold it against you.
irving102 1
Just say the adrenaline had your heart pumping
lukian_fml 29
Beat me to it!
RabbitOfAurora 28
Also beat me to it!
RedPillSucks 33
way too much beating going on
MrThump 16
Wow you managed to keep your boner while jumping into a pool and saving a kid! No way out of this than to tell the truth and tell them you were imagining your girlfriends pussy when shit went down.
vikky538 29
Next time before you go job... Make sure you keep your balls empty...
coried91 28
What?
cathrope 10
YDI! that's what you get for wearing a speedo.
coried91 28
I don't know if you have ever been swimming before but when guys swim shorts get wet they tend to stick to their bodies. That and he never mentioned being in a speedo.
worldclassrager 41
Too bad shrinkage couldn't cover that...
drworm94 12
YDI should stay focused and defos dont think about shit like that when you work around kids
HUGBUG 23
That's gotta be HARD... I'll let myself out
Ianamis 6
You could easily say it was Adrenaline just say that was what it was and you're good.